THE WALL: Taking a Look at Some Scary and Sad Stuff, and Letting It Go
I believe that compassionate detachment is a major component of self-mastery and spiritual awareness. To me this means, at least in part, that I continuously have to learn to let go of my own fears and guilt etc. and then do my best not take up new ones. I accept others where they are, even those whose actions and beliefs make me uncomfortable.
I don't need or want people to be "perfect." I don't know any perfect people and if I love someone, I love them as they are, even if they don't love me anymore. Things don't always work out the way we want them to. I know that, even if I wish it were not so.
I'm not saying it's easy. I'm no spiritual master - and I have my own issues to deal with. But I keep working on myself and I will until my last day as Sherry.
For me, compassionate detachment also means that I do NOT walk away from my responsibilities and go live in cave or a monastery on a mountain top to get my head straight and "be spiritual." (Whatever that means!)
Oh, for sure, there were times when I'd have liked to do just that!
I wanted to hide from the world - hide from myself, would more accurate.
I was carefully dissuaded from taking that dramatic step by a very kind and wise woman named the Reverend Master Jiyu-Kennett, who was the founder of the Order of Buddhist Contemplatives and the abbey on Mt Shasta, where she was Abbess.
I met her when I was just 19 and she had a profound effect on me. I immediately wanted to go live in the Abbey with her. She gently told me that I was always welcome to visit, but that I wasn't meant to live full time away from the world, meditating and praying.
Not this time.
She said that I could "live on a mountain" but I would have to go out and be with people to do my work, and to learn about myself. I was slightly crushed when she told me this, but I accepted what she had to say.
Looking back at that conversation of nearly fifty years ago, I know she was right. My life this time is about a path of self-responsibility and balance. I can see that retreating from the world wouldn’t bring me closer to the goal of learning about my path. How do I learn about self-responsibility? By being irresponsible. Balance? By going out of balance.
I learned rather quickly that I do not like myself when I am irresponsible and out of balance. It's painful. In this way, I have slowly learned to walk closer to the middle path.
Detachment doesn't mean you have to walk away from everything. It does mean that you learn to let go of your expectations and personal attachments to people, places, things, old patterns, etc. But sometimes walking away from people, places, things...is appropriate.
I have learning that offering assistance to my fellow humans is something that I enjoy. I've also learned that it doesn't help anyone to get into co-dependent behavior trying to rescue them.
It was hard to accept that I was not helping anyone when I made excuses for their poor behavior. It's not respecting myself - or them. How will anyone mature and learn to be responsible if we keep making excuses when they are casually cruel, or downright mean? Hard lessons - and sometimes it's scary to call someone out for being a jerk. I haven't met many people who appreciate that. Although at times is feels necessary to say something, I usually don't; I just walk away, rather than make a fuss. I've come to realize that I only rarely have a chance of saying anything useful in a situation like that.
No, I didn't go live in the Mt. Shasta Abbey, but I learned a lot from its Abbess. I was focused on spiritual growth before I met her. I already understood that everything in my life must support my spiritual and emotional growth. When I realized that it no longer served that purpose, then I stopped what I was doing and did something else. The Abbess was one of the few people who understood that I was serious about this, even at a young age. I've done a lot of things in my life. I didn't enjoy many of those things, but I learned to be present in the moment, as I learned what I needed to.
These days I travel quite a bit to do my spiritual work. I live on a small ranch in some mountains in Arizona. I leave my part of the mountain to go out into the world and when I do, I see a lot of people and have a lot of experiences.
I come home to my land and I lead a very quiet life. The energy of this land suits me, and it's easy to regenerate here. It's often tiring, too, as this old ranch is always in need of repairs. The many chores and repairs keep me busy but it's a constant job to keep this place habitable.
While I work, I have time to just be in the moment, focusing on the chores. When i meditate at night, a day of hard work leaves me feeling clear. That's when I can process my experiences with the goal of integrating what I've learned from each trip. It's a good balance for me.
I bet you thought I was writing about mediating and detachment, spiritual growth, etc. I am - but that's the framework of the story... I also want to share a spiritual experience that includes those things. I had it a number of years ago, yet, the experience is still evolving as I grow older. In fact, it continues to this day.
If you know me at all you know that I often tell stories and I tell them in a circular way. I sometimes start with a back story that might not make sense, at first. Eventually, I let the listeners (or readers) in on what the story is about and I make a point. There is always a point.
Be patient with me and I'll try to make the rest of this story interesting enough for you to keep reading.
Some years ago, I ended up in the hospital with a serious blood infection, brought on by a kidney infection that had gone nuts. I was very sick but I knew that this was a big lesson for me. I figured it probably had something to do with elimination of some kind…detachment and letting go. I call this a "waking dream."
"What do I need to let go of?" I asked myself.
The answer at that moment was a relationship. One that I had thought was long over and done with.
“Oh phooey,” I thought. “Well, OK, let's see what this is all about.”
Lying in that hospital bed with an IV drip of high powered anti-biotics, I slipped easily into a meditative state. Closing my eyes, I allowed my energy and consciousness to align with a higher vibration.
Almost immediately I went into a deeply altered state. I stepped into another reality and...
I found myself sitting in front of a wall.
Let me explain. I clearly recognized the wall because it is a place that I’ve spent many years in front of. That's my wall. I built it myself over lifetimes. I sit there, seeing myself "sitting before it" while in contemplation and meditation. I'm fully there, but other "Mes" from other times are also sitting there. I can see them if I look; I usually don't.
It's a long wall and quite high. There are many blocks made of a gray, sparkly stone with only tiny spaces in between them.
I understand that this "wall" is a metaphor for a place that every Soul must eventually come to: somewhere to sit quietly and examine ourselves and all of the things we have "walled off" from ourselves.
Nasty, yucky things are behind that wall: things that we don't want to look at.
I come before this spiritual wall to sit and reflect. I sit with all of the other "Mes" that my Soul used to be.
And as we sit there, the years quietly pass; lifetimes pass.
As we sit there, we may start to see some little imperfections; maybe we think about painting our wall to make it look nicer. We might note the rough places and try to smooth them out. In general, we spend quite some time making our wall "prettier."
But as time goes on, we grow bored with this busy work, and perhaps a bit curious. Some days, some times, we wonder what is behind the wall.
Finally, we try to climb up, but it is high and we settle for trudging around it.
We look and look. We are shocked, no stunned.
Behind the wall that we have made so "nice" is a huge pile of trash and filth. The most disgusting things that you can imagine are back there. Everything is covered in a slime and grime, so we can't see much detail but we can make out some things that we recognize as one belonging to us.
We don't want to look at this after all. It is too upsetting. The thought of maybe "owning" that horrible pile of crap is much too painful to bear. How could we have accumulated so much. All of it can't be ours. It can't be all mine.
But the truth is, it IS all ours and it is mine.
We go back out in front of the wall and sit down again, trying to pretend that we never saw the filth and garbage. Maybe we are able to forget...for a while. But at some point, in some life, we have to go look again.
Slowly, ever so slowly, we begin to clean it up, piece by piece. All of the lives and the experiences that we have had are behind this wall. Sometimes the shock of seeing something we once loved - or hated - keeps us from looking at it again for a long time.
We find a lot of trash, but sometimes there are other things, once hidden by the dirt and filth but clean now and ready to be useful again.
Of course, we would like to believe that "our wall" has less garbage behind it than other peoples' walls! But I doubt it. We all have one of those walls, and we all try to hide our filth and trash from each others sight - and our own.
I have spent my life looking at my wall, then finally, behind it. Yes, I've hidden from what I saw for a while - but then I always had to look again. Now I slowly clean it up, surprised at times to find some strength and beauty under the trash.
I sit before my wall. I know that my body is in the hospital, very ill and in a deep state of meditation. But I also sit before my wall.
I sit there thinking about what I've found behind it and how far I still have to go to get it all cleared out. That's a lot of work left to do.
I suddenly feel very tired and very sick... how can I find the energy to get moving again? I might die in the hospital while I'm just sitting there in front of this dumb wall. How will I ever clear out what is lurking behind my wall? It's too much and I start to cry.
I hear a noise.
This is something new! In all the years that I have been doing this, I’ve never seen anyone near my wall before.
I turn around and see a vehicle coming, off to the left. A cloud of dust floats behind it. As it gets closer, I see a run-down looking pick-up truck: a 1960 Chevy step-side, painted a faded blue.
The truck stops before me and a man gets out. Surprised, I instantly recognize him as a spiritual Master that I have worked with a few times before. He glances around and then looks right at me and says, "I'm here to help with the job!"
He pulls out a ladder & a huge box. Pointing at the wall, he says, "Take the ladder, and put it there – then climb up, lean over, and drag out everything you can reach that directly relates to the relationships you are trying to let go of. As you find things, just put it all into the box."
I climb up, up, up... then dangling over the top of the wall, I start pulling stuff out. Somehow I knew what to grab and what to leave. I started putting it all into the box.
With encouragement, I reached into the pile of past life issues and disappointments that were sitting there, just barely within my reach.
I cried as I picked up each piece of grimy trash, examining each carefully... remembering.
Remembering the good, the bad and the very, very sad. Truly we had hurt each other too many times and there was now too much water under the bridge... rushing through so fast that it was eroding it.
Hey, wait... I could hear singing... what was that. It sounds familiar...
"Can't get it out of my head... no I can't get it out of my head...
Midnight on the water
I saw the ocean's daughter
Walking on a wave, she came
Staring as she called my name
And I can't get it out of my headNo, I can't get it out of my headNow my old world is gone for dead'Cause I can't get it out of my head...
Breakdown on the shorelineCan't move, it's an ebb tideMorning don't get here tonightSearching for her silver light
And I can't get it out of my head
No, I can't get it out of my headNow my old world is gone for dead'Cause I can't get it out of my head, no-no
Bank job in the cityRobin Hood and William Tell and Ivanhoe and LancelotThey don't envy me, yeahSitting 'til the sun goes downIn dreams, the world keeps going 'round and 'round
And I can't get it out of my headNo, I can't get it out of my headNow my old world is gone for dead'Cause I can't get it out of my head, no, no
Oh, I can't get it out of my headNo, I can't get it out of my headNow my old world is gone for dead'Cause I can't get it out of my head, no, no, no, no
Here is a man who was out on a boat at night and saw something that changed his life – the “Ocean’s daughter” walking across the waves calling his name. It was a mermaid or something supernatural. Something so amazing that he couldn’t get it out of his head and his old world was “gone for dead.” He didn’t know what to do with the experience… and he had a breakdown. Going back to his regular life working at a bank seemed surreal and didn’t work for him - but he had no alternative.
The song reminds me of the struggle it can be to integrate spiritual experiences into our everyday life. When a person has an amazing and life changing experience it alters them - but they still have to function and live in the physical world. Their experience doesn’t “fix” everything, it just opens possibilities. We have to take the possibilities and figure out what to do with them.
It can be exciting to open to new ideas and experiences, but we still have to deal with the physical world. We may have a breakdown and then remake ourselves… or we may spend a long time yearning for the magical thing to happen again. We may find ourselves back in an old pattern after a while. After all, we are all dealing with patterns that are literally lifetimes old - and it can be difficult to identify those patterns, much less change them.
The music just kept going on and on... as I gently placed each item in the box I never knew how heavy sadness, disappointment and guilt really were. Not to mention fear...my fear was like lead behind that wall. It took everything I had to pull it up and out and it hurt.
I slowly, slowly started to feel lighter. Eventually I became more detached as I got the painful things out of my head, out of my heart... the music was fading away...
Finally, after a long time, I couldn't reach anything more behind the wall. I was done for the time being. I climbed down and the Master came closer.
"You forgot something", he said as he wiped the tears from my dusty face with a clean handkerchief.
"Put some more of your sorrow, your disappointment and your feelings of betrayal into the box too."
Those were somehow in a pocket that I didn't know I had. I pulled them out... and found that it was hard to let them go. They seemed so valuable in that moment. What would I do without them?
It was just an illusion; I could see that as he took them from my hands and carefully put them into the box.
He turned towards me again, and asked me if there were anything else that I wanted to let go of, before he left.
I thought about a few expectations and disappointments that I had regarding a group I belonged to. There were some "less than loving" actions a few members of the group had engaged in, with me as the focus. I figured that was what he was hinting at.
So back up the ladder I went. This time, my eye found only a few items. I tossed them into the box that never seemed to fill up.
Then, as I was about to climb down something caught my eye. There was something almost twinkling in the dirt; it was a small, blue toy airplane and it was very, very clean.
Turning to look at my teacher, I was about to ask him what this little plane was all about. But before I could open my mouth, he looked at me with a smile and winked. The little plane had wheels and a wind up mechanism. He took it from me, wound it up and set it down. It whizzed around us, making us both laugh. It couldn't fly, but it sure flew around us on it's tiny wheels. It almost seemed alive. Who knows, in that special place strange things can happen.
"Hey, Sherry, things may not always work out - and they might not "fly" like you want them to - but they can still work in other ways!"
“Wow”, I thought, “What a concept.”
That is true.
Sometimes I have expectations that aren't very realistic. If I can drop those expectations, sometimes the thing can still "fly" in a different way.
OK, not a perfect analogy, but I got the point.
When the little plane rolled to a stop, he picked it up and walked over to his truck. He climbed in, gave a little wave and drove off.
He took the box, but left me the ladder.
Now, the tears on my face were tears of gratitude.
Soon after this experience my fever broke, and my kidney infection quickly cleared up. The Docs were surprised, but since I was out of danger, they let me leave the hospital a couple of hours later. I recovered nicely.
Here's a strange one: in my bag of things the nurse gave to my friend who picked me up was a white handkerchief with what looked like teary scuff marks on it... I've never owned a white handkerchief, but I know someone who loaned me his and I still have it somewhere.
When I had that kidney infection, I was dealing with a failed relationship - actually more than one over the years. Even today, I still have things to let go of in that area of my life. I am not very good at it, but I am working on it.
The sadness does still come up sometimes, and I do my best to face how I feel. It's not comfortable, but I won't put any more of my garbage behind that wall and pretend it never existed. I deal with my residual pain as I feel it. I cope with the traumas that I've been through - and I keep going. I keep trying.
Writing about this experience once again reminds me that NOW is a good time to let go of some more of my old, worn out things that are still behind that wall.
We can't always work through everything that we had hoped to in a lifetime.
Not all relationships last though the rough patches; not all friends stay, even when they say they will never leave you. And sometimes it's been me who couldn't stay. We all hurt. We all have walls that we try to hide things behind.
This is life. It's sure not perfect and it's often really painful. But it's what we have. I make the best of mine, as best I can.
The bad times do not erase the good times I've had with the people I love. Yes, I still love them, even though I will never see them again, in this life.
I cherish those memories and I don't need to get them out of my head.
If I only focus on what I have lost, I can't see what I've gained, or see what I still have.
I still have a lot. It's with gratitude that I can acknowledge how lucky I am. I still have a treasure chest full of blessings.
It's late at night now - actually very early in the morning. I'm tired and sore. But in a short while I will go lay down and close my eyes. I'll open my consciousness to another realm, and I will "wake up" in another place and time, in front of a large stone wall that I know so well.
I will climb up that old ladder again. I'll reach over the top of my wall, and grab some more of the trash; the trash that I put there - hid there.
I'll find more regrets, more guilt, more sadness, and yes, more feelings of betrayal, real or imagined. Up and out will come some self-pity... and some self-importance. I grab as much as I can reach and toss them away. I'll simply let it all go, and watch as they dissolve on the way down.
As I do this, I will be remembering that my life can really "fly" now, without that extra weight.
In fact, I might even be able to soar!
Hey... it works for me - it really does! ;-D
>>>>My thanks to ELO for the lyrics I kept hearing from "Can't Get It Out Of My Head"
>>>>And thanks to those of you who stuck with this story to long enough to read about one of my spiritual experiences.
Real life can be more interesting than fiction: all of my stories, spoken or written, are true experiences that I've had.
I've been quite surprised to learn through Facebook and other social media posts that anything that can go wrong in your life can easily be blamed on Mercury Retrograde! Yes, I have read and heard some ridiculous stuff about Mercury Retrograde.
So, instead of shaking my head and uttering a few naughty words, (like WTF!)
I decided to write - and rewrite and rewrite and then add to - this blog post about what I know on the topic. So here it is.
Who am I to think I could shed some light on this weighty subject?
I started studying Astrology in 1973. I am not a world class expert, but after all that time, I am fairly competent - I know a few things about Mercury Retrograde that you might find useful and interesting.
I've aimed for simple and factual info about Mercury Retrograde. I hope that some of you are reading this with the hope of learning about the subject and how to use the energy, instead of blaming things that go wrong on poor little Mercury. :-D
Learning to go with the energy, instead of against it, will allow a Mercury Retrograde time period to become an incredibly productive occasion, in a different sort of way than you may have thought about. There are easy ways to figure out what the probable issues are that each Mercury Retrograde time period will bring up for you.
By the way, Mercury is not "in retrograde." It's either retrograde or it isn't. It can go retrograde, but it can't go "in Retrograde."
>>>> The next time you read something that says Mercury is "in" Retrograde, you'll know that the author is not an astrologer or astronomer - and take what they write about it with a grain of salt.
Now that you know this, pay attention and you'll see a LOT of writers on the subject do not refer to it correctly.
I’ve had three excellent teachers in the 49 years plus that I’ve studied astrology. Each had a different approach, different insights, and different strengths and weaknesses. Each was valuable to my overall understanding of and views about Astrology. My first teacher had an MD, a PhD and was also a Chiropractic Doctor. I’d joined his class so that I could learn enough to prove it was baloney. He gently showed me how ignorant I was within the first few minutes I was in his class. I still laugh when I think about that. I learned and remembered a valuable lesson about how silly and self-important I was that night about something I knew nothing about.
Self-importance and self-pity...they are two real stumbling blocks for humans.
The nice thing about ignorance - it's easily fixable when you decide you will open your mind and learn.
I've been interested in the psycho-spiritual uses of Astrology ever since my ignorance about it surfaced - and it’s given me valuable insights into myself and others. These insights that have helped me become more compassionate and less critical about things I don’t know anything about.
Before I start to explain a little about Mercury Retrograde, and how to deal with it, it’s good to understand that Mercury is Retrograde about 3-4 times per year. It's not a random or rare event; we know when it's going to happen. (Other planets retrograde, also.)
Mercury isn't really going backwards. No planet goes backwards. That's an optical illusion, created when the Earth and the other planet(s) move at different speeds. We can say that a lot of the info out there about Mercury Retro is also an illusion!
I have a list of dates that Mercury is Retrograde through this year, at the beginning and end of this article.
I’ve never been interested in using Astrology for predictive (fortune telling) purposes or to do doomsday readings. I’ve seen many good Astrologers get totally invested in a certain outcome that they’ve predicted - only to find out they were wrong – and yet they refuse to back down from their “know all, see all” stance. A lot of viral posts about predictions have been wrong way more times than they were right.
I’ve watched people I respect and love get all twisted up with fear by focusing on what the planets seem to be showing them. When you approach anything out of fear, it's usually lacking in clarity.
In a certain way, Astrology is a calendar that can be useful in understanding life’s patterns. We are likely to do certain things and feel certain ways, during certain planetary transits. Astrology is a great tool to use, to watch for those time periods and increase your awareness.
I don't run my life by Astrological events: far from it. I don't stay in bed when the aspects are 'bad' or Mercury or any other planet is retrograde.
I don't pick my friends and associates by what their chart looks like. I use Astrology as an additional way to understand myself, others, the energy around me - and to get insights into probable reasons people say and do things that are otherwise incomprehensible to me.
In astrology, retrogrades can be thought of as periods of time, during which your life may slow down a little - or a lot.
During those times, we are prompted to revisit various patterns, issues or struggles we've had in the past.
We can figure out what that may mean, as what comes up will depend on which planet is retrograde, what that planet's energy governs in astrology, and where that energy connects to us, in our birth chart.
Some of these things you can easily figure out on your own. Others, you may want the help of a competent professional astrologer.
Here are some of the most common generalizations (and superstitions) about Mercury Retrograde.
I’ll list a few of them here. They are based on things that traditionally relate to Mercury. Remember, it’s the planet that rules communication, logic, information, movement, technology and commerce.
I keep these things in mind when the energy is retrograde, but if I need to do something, buy one of those things, etc. I do it - I just do it carefully, mindfully and plan to need more patience than usual.
Here are some of the don'ts of Mercury Retrograde:
-Don't travel.
-Don't expect anything to happen according to schedule.
-Don't sign contracts.
-Don't start new projects.
-Don't buy electronics – especially communication devices.
I am not good at just stopping life while I wait for the right time to do the don'ts!
I’ve faced everything and done everything listed above, and more.
I’ve signed numerous contracts when Mercury was Retrograde and even (gasp) when the Moon was "Void of Course." (now that is a whole different thing!)
I've bought new phones, started new projects and scheduled meetings that really couldn't wait.
I have before, and will again, travel often when Mercury is Retrograde and/or when the aspects are terrible for traveling.
When I have a commitment to be in a certain place for a certain time period, I am going to be there, no matter what is going on with the planets!.
I do pay attention to the energy - and I plan ahead.
For example:
- I bring extra funds with me for “just in case” weird emergencies - even if that means that I take my property tax money out of savings and have it with me.
- If I'm driving, I make sure I have my insurance cards and the AAA membership paid up - and that the card is with me. I bring a toolbox, two jacks, and have at least one extra spare tire and tools with me. |
I once had NINE flat tires during a cross country trip with Mercury Retrograde. No kidding! My advice is to only buy from a nationwide tire place, whenever possible and always buy the tire road hazard insurance!
- If I'm flying or taking a train, I make darn sure I know the schedule, keep on top of it, and verify that I am at the right gate or on the right platform way earlier than seems logical.
There are almost always unusual delays and changes that come up at the last minute when Mercury is Retrograde.
- I am careful not to make appointments that leave me no leeway with timing.
- I communicate as clearly as I know how to and do it often, even if it annoys the people around me.
- I plan to take a nap whenever possible during that time period!
Sometimes I travel with groups of people and if Mercury is Retrograde, I realize some of them may not communicate, with me or each other, nearly as effectively as normal, during a Mercury Retro period of time.
Some will be late or forget about the timetables altogether.
Phones will break or we'll have no service...
Other techy things may break, also.
Buses, planes, trains, automobiles... any form of transportation may suddenly not be available, or break down, and their schedules may change or get cancelled.
I make sure to communicate with the people I am traveling with or meeting - and I do it as often and as clearly as possible about all of this.
I tell the whole group on the first day that Mercury is Retrograde and then I explain what I think about it and how we can learn from it… I answer their questions over and over - I check, and double check, and do not assume anything.
There are always glitches, but so what? We always get through it and have fun!
Side note: I always try to carefully ask around to see if there are any astrologers in the group. If they know much about Mercury Retrograde they could be a real ally with the rest of the group... however, if they they start out saying Mercury is IN Retrograde, it usually goes downhill from there. I politely listen...and thank them for their opinion.
I refrain from asking them why they are on the trip if they expect nothing but disaster.
I understand this energy as well as anyone can, so I know that I'll be repeating myself a lot over the coming days of the trip and I prepare myself to be patient and have fun with it, if at all possible.
Most of all, I take responsibility for my own thoughts, feelings and behavior whether or not Mercury is Retrograde.
(I have more than a few stories about the strange things that have happened while traveling during Mercury Retrograde, while in many different countries, with many different people!)
Instead of fearing a Mercury Retrograde period, I suggest you learn to be aware of it and then work with the energies!
Mercury Retrograde is not an excuse to be disorganized or irresponsible.
Here are some other situations that may come up:
Try to avoid making big commitments during Mercury Retrograde, unless it's about something that's already been set up beforehand.
If you have to sign a new lease, or a contract, or you are about to accept a new job - it's highly unlikely that you will be able to ask if you can wait to sign until Mercury is direct again! So... Confront your fear of what could happen and get clear about how you can mitigate the effects.
For example, go over a contract or anything you have to sign more than once; become familiar with the details before you sign anything. Be responsible!
If you can afford it, get an attorney to go over it. You can also read it out loud to yourself or have someone else read it to you; hearing it uses a different part of your brain and this can be a very effective method of comprehending more precisely what you are signing.
Mercury rules thinking and logic, so you may tend to over think things during a Retrograde.
Catch yourself and try to monitor your inner self talk - be kind to yourself!
Re-direct any semi or full on obsessive tendencies!
Yes, sometimes things go wrong - but they can, and do, go wrong even when Mercury isn't Retrograde.
All of this having been said, some people do feel a Retrograde more than others. Knowing this is possible, remind yourself that there really are ways to mitigate the effects: you can handle it - this too shall pass.
HERE IS A FACT:
Retrogrades of any planet - and especially Mercury - can be an incredibly productive time!
HOW?
Slow down, review your past, and take a close look at the direction you are headed in.
It's a great time to stop and consider where you are going - maybe try to look at it from a new perspective. Your life will move forward anyway, but it can't hurt to take a good look at where you are going and decide if that's what you really want or not.
In a very real way, Mercury Retrograde represents “Bear Medicine.”
(I've written about Bear Medicine in another blog post.)
Bear teaches us to go out into the world and gather as many life experiences as we like; but then to go back to our “cave” to take the time to process and integrate what we’ve experienced.
Without taking the time to “go to our caves” and take a break from rushing headlong into one thing after another, we cannot make full use of what we’ve learned. We need time to think things through.
Take time to reflect on your life and your direction.
Have a sense of humor about things. Try laughing at the blunders Mercury Retrograde brings your way. Mercury Retrograde doesn’t need to be a disaster - far from it!
An astrologer I once knew told me this:
Instead of saying:
"Oh no, with Mercury Retrograde everyone will be running late!"
Try saying:
"Hey, no problem. It's Mercury Retrograde, so go ahead and take your time!"
Mercury Retrograde could be the perfect reason to ease up on yourself: leave for work early - be aware that you might arrive late, and either be OK with that, if it happens - OR leave early!
If you can, maybe take some time off and/or take a nap; or reconnect with old friends.
In any case, take time to reflect!
Rushing around won’t help a thing and you will be going WITH the energy if you are willing to allow yourself to slow down.
The stars don't hold some kind of absolute power over you. You have free will - so use it!
Mercury Retrograde doesn’t rule your life - I hope I've given you some ways of approaching these times - there is no need to have the mindset or fear that Mercury Retro takes over your life.
If you let your anxiety about Mercury Retrograde guide your behavior, you can make yourself miserable; your life could feel impossible and you might be fairly impossible to be around.
Live your life and do what you need to do: whenever and however you need to do it. Think ahead and have a Plan B and maybe a Plan C or D! Things will work out - one way or another.
Because this is all about Astrology, many people want some kind of prediction. I’ve already said I’m not focused on predictions, but I know an interesting and effective “old school” way to get some clues about what an upcoming Mercury Retrograde may be about for you.
I’m talking about something called “Shadow Periods.” These are the times directly before and after a Retrograde period. They are arguably just as significant as a Retrograde itself.
“Shadow periods” aren't discussed much anymore, maybe because working with them takes making the effort to pay attention to the little things that foreshadow events in your life; it takes some increased awareness to make use of them.
These time periods can be incredibly useful if you know about them - and pay attention.
Simply put, the “pre-shadow” period happens before Mercury is Retrograde, about 2-3 weeks beforehand. The pre-shadow time period gives you indications or hints about what parts of your life you can expect to be dealing with during the upcoming Retrograde period.
The “post-shadow” period goes on for about 2-3 weeks after the Retrograde. It offers you an opportunity to tie up any loose ends, get clear about any lingering issues - or to reconsider situations you may decide to change.
In other words: the “pre-shadow period” reveals what the issue might be that is about to come about during the period of time that Mercury is Retrograde.
Then, the “post-shadow” period energy helps to resolve the issue.
Here’s something that might help you understand the concept – it’s easy to use the shadow periods, when you know what you are looking for.
The classic example of this is that you and your significant other start fighting a lot during the pre-shadow period. Then you break up, or come very close to it during the Retrograde.
During the post-shadow period you realize that you don't want to lose your relationship. You start to communicate more effectively with your partner to resolve it, and as a result, you get back together.
There is another thing that can give you some insights: the area of your life that will be effected and where you will take stock of your situation - depends on the planet that is Retrograde, and how it relates to other things in your birth chart. That starts to get a bit tricky for an amateur, so consult a professional Astrologer if you are interested in following up on this idea!
Work with the energy - it will show you what you need to work on if you pay attention. It might seem too hard to do at first, but if you take the time to think deeply, then process and integrate what is really going on and how you feel about it, then it will resolve; the energy will support your hard work.
In that same vein, here's an old saying that I've found to have some merit:
“Whatever you lose during Mercury Retrograde will be returned to you.”
Lastly, people who are born during Mercury Retrograde usually do very well - and even thrive - during a Retrograde period.
Maybe you are one of those people!
Google the Mercury Retrograde dates for your year of birth and find out.
And if you do have Mercury Retrograde in your birth chart and you have been freaking out a little about Mercury Retrograde...well it may give you some reassurance and something you can feel good about from now on!!
;-D
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If you don’t have an accurate birth chart and want one, I can help you with that! I offer reasonably priced (cheap!) accurate personalized Astrological charts and reports. You can check out the list of chart wheels and reports that we have available.
https://www.crystal-skulls.com/collections/personalized-metaphysical-reports
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Here is something to look forward to:
Six planets will be Retrograde this year!
Here is a bit about the other planets.
You can expect the energy surrounding these planets to get stirred up and even "turned upside down" when a Retrograde of one of them happens! Some are easier than others... some you may feel more intensely. In general we could say that...
Mars is vitality, action, disagreements, energy, and passions.
Venus is associated with love, beauty, luxury, and the Arts.
Jupiter is the energy of expansion, philosophy, growth, and abundance.
Saturn is responsibility, structure, and duty.
Neptune is fantasy, inspiration, dreams, spirituality, illusion, and confusion.
Pluto is transformation, renewal, and rebirth.
Uranus is a rebellious energy, the unexpected, changes, and originality.
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The Rainbow Meditation addresses Spiritual Healing, Gaining Clarity, Working with your Angels and Guidance, Grounding, and more!
To get your FREE copy:
Click here.
ADD IT TO YOUR CART AND CHECK OUT - IT WILL TAKE YOU THROUGH CHECK OUT AND SHOW A ZERO BALANCE! You must complete checkout, with a valid e-mail address, and then the download instructions will be sent out shortly.
****NOTE: THIS IS A MEDITATION AND CAN CAUSE AN ALTERED STATED OF CONSCIOUSNESS! NEVER LISTEN TO IT WHILE DRIVING OR OPERATING MACHINERY!
For decades, Sherry has led numerous workshops internationally, on spiritual, metaphysical & esoteric subjects. Her focus is on spiritual awareness and development, as well as the empowerment and validation of the individual.
Clairvoyant since early childhood, Whitfield has an unusual background, having worked as a "Sensitive," in a medical doctor’s office for several years, assisting the doctor in gaining insights into atypical or difficult medical and psychiatric conditions. Additionally, she has collaborated with scientific researchers at the University level, working to understand subtle energies and states of consciousness. Based near Tucson, Arizona, Sherry graduated from the world renowned 'Desert Institute of the Healing Arts' in 1991 and has extensive experience in shamanic techniques, crystal healing, and other alternative healing practices for over 45 years.
Sherry is the current "Keeper" or guardian of the ancient crystal skull known as Synergy. Sherry and Synergy’s work together is rooted in building a group vibration or resonance that encompasses compassion, gratitude, acceptance and an ever increasing ability to give and receive love.
Remember, the Rainbow Meditation is FREE of charge for a limited time! Just add it to your cart, checkout with a zero balance, and a button will appear for the download.
(An e-mail will also arrive soon after with a direct download link.)
Access the awesome power and beauty of a crystal skull!
Interviewers love to ask me if someone can take an ancient crystal skull like Synergy and do something “evil” with it.
Maybe it's the skull shape that brings up these questions with people. After all, in this day and age, and in this culture, the skull is associated with death. That doesn’t begin to scratch the surface of what they actually represent; just a century or so ago, the general public knew this.
Could someone 'bad' access the power of a crystal skull?
People misuse power and do awful things every day. What if one of the really old crystal skulls fell into the hands of someone who has selfish or even evil intentions? There are a lot of stories and some firsthand accounts of experiences with the ancient crystal skulls as objects of intense power, on many levels.
As “Keeper” of Synergy, one of the only crystal skulls with a verifiable and ancient history, I have been privileged, and sometimes dismayed, to witness and experience “firsthand” unusual phenomena happening around it, to myself, and others: small things and larger things…
There have been things that I have struggled to wrap my head around, because I have no rational explanation for what I experienced.
I don’t often share details about these things; I respect sacred moments and events. I understand that some things should not be written about, and others, not even spoken about. The truly sacred is often also ephemeral.
But setting the sacred aspects aside for a moment… who would ever believe some of the weird, wonderful and at times, terrifying occurrences that have happened to me and around me? Only the people who were with me at those times can truly understand; I am rarely alone when unusual things occur.
So, could someone dark - someone “evil” - access the power of an ancient crystal skull?
If it only takes a strong Will and/or a strong intention to access a crystal skull's energy, then the answer would be yes.
Luckily, for us it makes no difference at all how badly someone wants to access a crystal skull’s power - or how tightly focused they may be in their intentions. Energy normally follows intention, but in this case, a strong intention is not even close to what is required to truly access the energy, power, information and records in an ancient crystal skull.
This is what I have experienced: there is a built in safeguard in the most powerful crystal skulls that limits access, and protects the skull from being accessed, in order for someone to misuse it.
You could say that the crystal skulls are “password protected” from someone with evil intentions.
Whatever power the ancient crystal skulls possess - and I am sure that we have not even begun to understand what they offer humankind - there is only one way to access it.
What is the Password that opens the energy and power of an ancient crystal skull?
The password into an ancient crystal skull is not in any language, and it’s not written in an “unbreakable” mathematical code. The key that grants “entry” is a vibration or frequency. The human who touches the crystal skull in order to access its records or its power must be able to consistently hold that frequency for the entire time before, during and even after they work with a crystal skull.
That frequency is love – unconditional love. Love truly is the greatest power of all... and this is a very specific and untainted kind of love.
For me, and many others, it is the pure and sweet love, along with amazement and gratitude – that I felt this when I held my daughter for the first time.
It’s the love I feel for, and that is returned to me tenfold and more, by my animal family: my dogs, horses, donkeys, goats, cats, birds, and even my fish...
Animals and small children. What do they have in common? It’s so simple: these beings open our hearts. They don't lie about love!
The purity of their kind of love is beyond precious. There is no way to fake this feeling, no matter how hard someone tries. In fact, the harder a person “tries” to feel that kind of love, the harder it is to experience. It’s not about trying at all, it’s about opening ones heart and allowing the love to pour out, and then in again, and out, and in…over and over.
Do this for hours, days, months - and even years... it takes time to access the energy of an ancient crystal skull, experience it, “download” it, process what has been perceived during this “procedure” and then do it again, and again.
Slowly one can begin to integrate their understanding into something comprehensible. Maybe. Or, maybe not. Some experiences and perceptions don’t translate that well… But at that point, it doesn’t matter anyway, because experiencing that unconditional love as it’s being amplified and reflected back at a person, over and over, transforms them.
Anything and everything I have seen, known, or experienced of Synergy’s “power” (or any other crystal skull, for that matter) has been through opening my heart in this manner.
If a person can't hold that pure and uncomplicated frequency in their mind and heart, they will never access the true power of a crystal skull. And when you do access that energy… well, that is a prize selfish people will always covet, but can never begin to understand or even recognize.
I don't think “bad guys” can manage to hold that vibration for very long, if at all. They would probably think this kind of “password” is weak.
And by the way…an open and compassionate heart also allows one to “open” and access the energy of any contemporary crystal skull. Touch a crystal skull with this frequency of love active in your energy field and you will be able to access its energy!
Touch the world around you with this frequency of love and watch things transform.
Now, after all of that having been said, I do have to admit that someone could pick up a crystal skull and use it to hit someone... but I don’t think that’s what the interviewers have in mind when they start asking me questions!
LOL
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If you want to experience the real power of a crystal skull, open your heart to love and gratitude.
Close your eyes and begin by breathing slowly and deeply for about 3-4 breaths as you…
Relax your eyes…. Relax your tongue… Relax your jaw...
Now, go ahead and drop your shoulders…and your arms…
And continue to breathe slowly and deeply…
Now I’d like for you to bring thoughts of someone or something that you love, into your mind and into your heart. Someone or something simple and uncomplicated… like a small child or an animal. Now pretend or imagine that this someone or something that you love is right in front of you, close enough to give them a hug. Take another breath and bring their essence close to your heart, breathing in the love you have for them. And…Allow that love to gently open your heart, to whatever degree is appropriate for you, at this time.
Now put your attention on the base of your spine, on your root chakra. It's often perceived as a bright, clear red, a bit like Jello. Now pretend or imagine that you have roots, like tree roots coming out of the base of your spine and going down deep into the ground, securing you to Mother Earth. You are secure, and this connection allows you complete freedom of movement both physically and energetically. Let any tension drain out of you, and feel yourself sinking deep into the earth.
Now bring thoughts of something or someone that you are grateful for, into your mind and into your heart... and focus on feeling the emotion of gratitude.
And just continue breathing… slowly and deeply
Finally, take another couple of deep breaths in and then let them out slowly...
And when you are ready, open your eyes.
Thus began the cycle of The Tower energy, which brought profound shifts and changes, as the energies relentlessly insisted that we release our outworn beliefs and ways.
It's a challenge to humanity: will we confront tyranny and oppression, corruption, and the deceptions of our world, in an age of rampant materialism? Can we do this without closing our hearts to one another? I pray we do.
The good news is that the energetic cycle changed when The Great Conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn Conjunction arrived on December 21, at 0.1° Aquarius, coinciding with the Winter Solstice.
On that day, we began a cycle with Saturn and Jupiter in air signs, and this will remain in effect until 2159. This was the long awaited start of the Aquarian age; also known by some as the Star of Hope.
Like a Star, glimmering in the darkness, this is the spark that marked the beginning of moving towards a more humanistic and inclusive society.
Obviously this won’t happen overnight, but the Great Conjunction marked the beginning of surging growth in the areas of technology and ideology, bringing into even more focus issues of social justice, original thinking, and innovation.
It will eventually affect how we structure the allocation of resources, our agricultural practices, our finances, and global environmentalism. Aquarius energy loves the unconventional, and it rules over technological innovations, as well as communal health and wellness.
The Tower energy has shaken the world, but remember that even when we are in the dark, the Light exists; look up and see the Stars.
The Star is the energy of Hope, healing, and optimism; it will always shine through the dark.
Even though this has been a chaotic period, we have been given a gift: we can become aware of our ingrained societal, cultural and personal patterns that do not serve us, or humanity in general. We can awaken now, with a resolve to make the necessary adjustments, gather together what can still be of use to us, then refocus and rebuild.
Yes, it's been a difficult time, but perhaps the result will be something that is better for the planet, the humans, and the other Beings who we share this world with.
The cycle will continue for over 100 years, and during that time, we will have to accept the fact that no one will save us from ourselves; each of us must step up and do our part.
I recently shared a story about gifts, collies and more. If you missed it, I suggest you go back and read part one! It continues here...
The story did not end with me handing my puppy, Peter, over to the nice woman from Mexico.
She kept in touch with me regularly. Her vivid letters, describing their simple lives together, helped me work though my feelings. As the months wore on, hers was obviously the place Peter was destined to go. From the first day they got home, he acted as if he had been born there.
This four-month-old puppy went directly to her old, nearly blind collie, Lassie, that still lived. He greeted her, let her sniff him thoroughly and led her confidently over to the sheep. Then, the two of them proceeded to work together, putting them right into the pen, without hesitation.
The woman took it for granted that this was what they were supposed to do, but it was quite amazing, since Peter had never worked with even my chickens or ducks before. I was still in a wheelchair at that point, recovering from another surgery. My collies all had heart, and loved to work. They were always in tune with what "their human" wanted; I am sure that to Peter, it seemed that this was just the right thing to do.
But there was even more to this... a lot more...
About six months after I had handed Peter over, I got a frantic call from the woman. Something had happened to Peter, who they now called (of course) Laddie II.
She had taken him to a veterinarian, for a booster shot. Just as the vet was about to give it to him, someone burst into his office, startling the doctor, badly. He'd been robbed of his vaccines and generic medicines the week before, at gunpoint. As the doctor turned to see who was coming in, Laddie/Peter turned his head and the vaccine went into his eye, blinding him, instantly.
She drove to a pay phone and called me collect, frantic and feeling horribly guilty. I was just sick and angry. How could this happen to such a beautiful animal? Obviously, I thought, the vet was incompetent! I should have never let this woman have him, I thought. I had her bring Laddie back to Tucson, to my vet, at my expense, to be checked over. He was indeed stone blind in that eye. His lovely expression was now really strange, with that weird, cloudy eye. It was a real shame.
Still, the dog didn't seem to care how he looked. The woman was already heartsick -- so what could be done? Since young Laddie was healthy in every other way, the vet said what I already knew . . . "Take Laddie home."
A week or so went by before the woman’s next letter arrived. This one told me the real reason that it was the right thing for me to send my special Peter to Mexico, to become another "Laddie" and why he was now blind.
While the woman and Laddie were gone, a small local boy had been injured in an accident. The boy had been blinded, in the same eye as Laddie. His friends made fun of him and his family turned him out on the streets to beg. Sometimes people can be very cold to someone with disabilities - even their own child. His family was very, very poor and their reality was different from mine. They saw the boy as a liability.
When the almost full grown big collie came home, the lady took him into town, walking right down the main "street."
All of the kids in the small town and some adults were following him. The new Laddie had become so popular that nearly everyone vied for his attention and to give him a pat. I can just imagine him strutting his stuff, with his tail proudly waving back and forth -- and a big smile on his face! He cared not a bit that he couldn't see out of one eye. He was still gorgeous and never doubted for a moment that he was still the King of their hearts! And he was right.
I cry, even as I think of it now.
Laddie walked by the small boy, sitting in the street, trying to beg. The little boy was depressed and suicidal. The dog stopped. The boy looked up at the dog that was everyone's hero and saw what had happen to Laddie’s eye.
Laddie had never played favorites with the kids, bestowing his kisses and grins equally. But somehow, my darling pup knew the boy needed him. Leaning into the boy, Laddie sat beside him, licking him all over and extending his paw. The boy threw his arms around the big dog and the two of them got up, walking down the road together... all the way to the woman’s ranch.
To the amazement of the villagers, young Laddie went right back to work, gathering in the sheep and playing with the children.
He never seemed to notice his partial blindness and it certainly didn't affect his usefulness. The boy was Laddie's favorite, from then on and when the boy's family saw the collie hard at work, just like always, it touched them. The boy wasn't forced to beg anymore. He moved in with the woman and lived and worked at the ranch, with Laddie.
I am beyond glad that I overcame my strong desire to keep Peter for myself. Letting him go was so hard... but over and over I was assured that everything happened just as it was supposed to.
If I had had any doubts in my mind after all of that, when I heard the little boy’s name, I received another confirmation.
His name is Pedro, which is, of course, Spanish for Peter.
No matter how it is spelled, Peter will always be one of my favorite names; it carries so many bittersweet memories for me. Yet the sound of that name is also a gift.
A few years later after Peter/Laddie went to his destiny on a ranch I became pregnant with a son that I lost at 7 months. That's another story for another time and place... What I will say is that he was a precious gift from our Creator, but I never held him in my arms; he wasn't meant to be in this world. I'd decided on his name before I had to let him go, and as you might guess, I named him Peter.
The ones called Peter, (no matter how they are spelled,) are in my heart, always.
This is a true story about Gifts and Guidance, Letting Go...and a very special Dog.
This is Part One. Look for Part Two in another blog entry.
I was a collie breeder for almost 25 years. Like every kid in the Fifties, I grew up watching Lassie. It was always thrilling to see Lassie come to the rescue. Yet that is not what brought the love of collies into my heart.
When I was seven, my great-grandfather went into a rest home. Every other day, we’d go to visit him, so he would not be lonely. In the room with my Great grandpa was another elderly man.
The old man had lots of exciting pictures on his wall, with all kinds of animals doing tricks. Some were even in the movies! He and his son were animal trainers. The old man was proud of the fact that his son had helped train the original "Lassie." Actually, "Lassie" was several 'boy' dogs and none were very good looking collies, but I didn’t know that.
Seeing my shy fascination, he enjoyed telling me animal stories as much as I loved hearing them. Until then, I was sure I wanted to be a ballerina, like another of great-grandpa’s friends. Now, I yearned to experience the close relationship to an animal that the old man described so vividly.
He said that they were always needing more "Lassie look-a-likes" to train and promised me a puppy from one of their upcoming litters. My family did not have any extra money to buy a dog, especially a dog that was from such a famous line. The old man winked and told me not to worry. He could not take care of his puppy in the rest home, so I could look after it for him! He showed me snapshots of the Mom and Dad and we waited eagerly for the due date.
When the pups were born, he showed me the latest pictures every week, finally circling the puppy that was to be "ours." The days went by very slowly, but when they were about six weeks old, he told me that his son was bringing "our puppy" to see us the next week.
Up early that day, Grandma drove me to the rest home. I ran in, nearly falling over my own feet in my excitement. My friend was sitting up in bed and had the smiling puppy on his knee. I slowly approached and reached my hand out, the pup wobbling toward me, with a happy yip! I held him close and stroked his soft, warm fur, marveling at his tiny perfect feet and white-tipped tail. When he washed my cheek with his pink, pink tongue, I was in heaven!
For many years, I dreamed of the gift I received that afternoon. My dreams were the only place in my life that puppy ever lived. The fantasies of a little girl took no notice of the fact that she had recently begun having life threatening allergic reactions to almost everything in her environment.
For more than five years, my parents sat up night after night with me, as I went through the painful and often disfiguring, giant hives. They threatened to cut off my airways and drove me mad with the itching and painful, burning inflammation.
Specialists were baffled at the intensity of the attacks. At that time, no one understood that I'd had a traumatic brain injury that was at the foundation of the problems I had started to have. As one Doctor later said, since I'd survived the initial injury no one had any idea for a long time how serious it really was.
Rigid allergy diets, ripping up the new wall-to-wall carpets and living with an air cleaner did not significantly help me. Of course, a puppy was out of the question. The adults had thought I understood my circumstances well enough and did not realize that I was totally serious about making that puppy mine.
My heart was broken and it stayed broken until I grew up. I outgrew many of the worst of the all-encompassing allergies and the aid of the newest antihistamines and consistent attention to keeping my thyroid and other endocrine glands balanced I was well enough to lead a more normal life. But I never forgot the puppy, or the old man who saw the hunger I had for that puppy.
I grew up and when I finally lived in a large enough place for a big dog, I bought what I had wanted for so long.
To this day, I can never watch a collie running toward me, or stroke the fleecy coat of a puppy without holding my breath for an instant and feeling that little catch in my throat.
My great-grandpa and the old man both died that year; the collie puppy went to another little girl. But he will always be mine in my heart.
The willing generosity of an old man and the unqualified love that I received with the wet "puppy kiss" made a lasting impression on me. It became a cascading ripple of perfect and unconditional love running through my life.
A Gift far larger and longer lived than a puppy - it became a pivotal point in my life. And over the years, I have tried to pass it on.
Once in awhile, usually in the course of my work, I will come across a stranger with whom I feel a certain kind of a connection. Maybe it is a just look in their eye, a note in their voice, or a wistful smile as they turn something over in their hands that I have or might be selling. Sometimes I feel guided to try and see if I can help them get that thing. I know that most people don't understand my motives; I know it because people give me a hard time about me giving things away. I can't and won't defend myself or define why I do this - not to someone who has never felt as I have.
I don't have a lot of money, but I don't feel poor. I know that giving things away is not a "sound" business practice, because you can't pay your bills when you do it too much. But I don't care.
When I do it, it's not a feeling of pity or of wanting to take care of someone. It's just something I feel I must do.
Actually, when I feel that strange connection, it’s not even always something that I always want to do or feel happy and excited about doing, at that moment. And it doesn’t always make sense - at least then. As inexplicable as it may sound, I receive so much more than I could ever possibly give when I let something go.
As I have grown older, I’ve learned to trust my instincts. I've discovered that there are certain times and certain people, when I just "know" something is the right thing to do. Maybe that old man is watching me, urging me on . . .
One of those times involved another collie puppy.
And that the rest of this story.
At that point in my life, I had been breeding and showing working collies for many years. A few months earlier, I’d had a successful breeding that produced a big sable male puppy who looked like he was going to be everything I had hoped for. I had planned this breeding for years, and wanted to keep two of the pups from this litter for myself. I had several nice dogs, but this puppy was my pride and joy and I knew exactly what his name was going to be: Peter.
When Peter was about 14 weeks old, I got a call at 11:30pm one night, from a woman that I had never met. I was annoyed that she called so late and felt tired and impatient and told her so. She said she was looking for a big sable male puppy; it had to be sable, and it had to be male. Sable is the most popular color, due to "Lassie," and every "backyard breeder" around likes to breed them because selling even their worst sable puppies is easier than any other color.
So, I replied to the woman with a laugh: "Who isn’t looking for a sable male collie?" The only sable I had left was Peter, so I told her that I did not have any right now was not planning another breeding for at least a year. She didn't say anything for a moment and then said, "Are you sure?"
I felt a strange feeling come over me. She went on. None of the collie breeders she had seen so far had any dogs who could herd worth a bean. In a grocery store in Phoenix, she’d spied a magazine called "Pet World." In it, she had found an ad for my kennel, and suddenly, she’d felt that God was urging her to call me–that I would know the right dog for her. With a prayer on her lips, she put her coins in a payphone and dialed me. (Yes, this was a while ago, when there used to be payphones all over!)
She was a humble woman, used to people refusing her. She was also stubborn, very patient and a devout believer that the Lord had told her that she would be provided with her sable collie. I knew of only a very few people raising collie dogs with the kind of natural working ability that my dogs had, and no one I knew would sell her one at any price, at that moment.
I hated to disappoint her, but of course there was no way that I would sell my Peter. Regretfully, but firmly, I bid her good bye and put her out of my mind.
However, it was just not that easy. I found the memory of that strange late night call creeping into my mind. By the time I got her second call, I had already gone over all of the reasons why it wasn’t my problem to help her get a dog. Why did she have to show up needing a male sable collie now? Why not last week, when I had four??!!
I felt somehow that this was not just a whim on her part, but an actual need. But the only one I had left was Peter. We had not discussed money, but I knew that she couldn’t have much money. It was not up to me to let some stranger have MY collie! My dog was worth at least fifteen hundred dollars and maybe more back then - and he was priceless to me.
I really loved Peter; I had planned for him, bred him, helped his mother whelp him and I would not let him go.
Night after night, I tossed and turned, frustrated and mad at myself for even taking her call to begin with. Nevertheless, after her third call, I reluctantly told her to come on up to my house and we would talk.
The woman showed up at my doorstep looking tired and intense. I invited her in and gave her a glass of water. She turned out to be a small, dark woman, in her late 40's, with the slightest hint of an accent. She sat down and sat up straight, as she told me her story.
Her parents had been missionaries and she’d grown up in South America and later, southern Mexico. She’d returned to the U.S. after her parents died and their church had abandoned the financial support for their mission. She went back to school in her twenties and became a teacher, but she felt restless and empty.
About fifteen years before, on a vacation, she had found a beautiful, yet remote, mountainous village about 300 miles south of the US border. She felt drawn back to the people and the land, feeling that God was telling her to make it her home. Using her small inheritance, she bought a house with a few acres and several outbuildings. She would devote her life to teaching people to read. However, she had found that this "simple task" was not so easy.
It seemed that her new neighbors, had grown tired of the steady trickle of tourists who would show up with money in their pockets, trying to buy everything they thought was quaint or interesting. They paid fees for taking photos of locals they thought looked "funny." Many let the villagers and their children know that they thought they were savages. The village needed the small cash flow, but they bitterly resented the "holier-than-thou" Americans. The woman was not like that, but no one had seemed willing to give her a chance to show them.
Hoping to make a difference in the quality of the local people’s lives with her knowledge and skills, she started a small school for the children. But, their parents were suspicious of the woman and the children would rather be outside in the sun and wind than stuck inside, with dusty smelling books. She planted a garden and bought some livestock, hoping to share her food and meat, but the proud villagers refused her offerings with a polite smile, but without a word. She was and would remain, it seemed, an outsider.
One day, a year or so after her move, she made one of her infrequent trips back into the U.S., to visit an old friend. She told her of the frustration, loneliness and daily difficulties she faced in her adopted home. Lately, it was so discouraging that she was ready to give up and move back to the States. She felt that the Lord was asking her to give it another try. Hearing the description of her old friend’s daily life, her simple faith struck the friend. She was moved by the unrelenting, struggle and loneliness of the woman’s life.
As they caught up with each other, a thought entered the friend’s mind, accompanied by a strong rush of excitement. She asked her if she had ever thought of getting a dog to keep her company; a dog who would also carry its own weight by helping with the livestock. She knew of some puppies for sale on a neighboring farm and she thought that one would be just the thing for her.
The woman slept on it and prayed about it. When she left for the village, three days later, she had not one, but two, purebred collie puppies with her. Many collies have had the working ability bred out of them, but she was lucky enough to have a pair who still had some instincts.
She named them "Lassie" and "Laddie," of course.
As she raised them, she found them to be relatively easy to train to handle her sheep and chickens. Soon, they were of inestimable help. In more ways than one. Within the month, it became obvious that the collies had another, even more important job. Even in this remote area, people had heard of "Lassie." Folks were curious about the woman’s new helpers and soon, local children were sneaking over to visit. The youngsters’ fears were forgotten in their excitement to see Lassie and Laddie. One by one, the mothers and fathers stopped by to see what kind of dogs had so enthralled their kids.
The woman slowly built up trust and the children became regular visitors to her little ranch. After a time, she was able to enlist a few of them to help her to brush the burrs out of a collie or two. It became a privilege to sit brushing and petting the collies, as the woman read stories to them all. Before they knew it, children were learning to read. Their parents would sometimes stop by, lingering to watch. After a time, they began to speak with the woman. Slowly, in a more relaxed way, they began picking up information that helped them to grow a little more food or manage their stock a little better or even understand what better hygiene practices could do for them.
Now the woman could do what she had always dreamed of – and she finally had a home. The collies had become her ambassadors.
By the time the woman entered my life, the two collies had done this kind of work for nearly thirteen years. That year, Laddie, had finally died. The children were heartbroken and old "Lassie" was depressed and had a hard time getting around without her partner. The woman felt her work was beginning to unravel. So, after praying about it for a week, she had confidently come to the states to find another collie; a working collie. A big sable male.
I brought my beautiful Peter to her. She gathered him up in her arms, as he eagerly licked her face in the way that all collies do. He was pure, pure love.
And as I watched them I knew. He was not mine anymore. Peter was going to Mexico. He had work to do, and I had to let him go.
Within the hour she had her new puppy kit, dry food, his favorite toys and Peter. I waved a good-bye with tears in my eyes and tried to let them both go in peace.
I will never say that this was an easy to do. I still miss him, even after 30 years. But the story didn't end there. Far from it. Sometimes we get a little glimpse 'behind the curtain' of destiny and it changes you forever.
LOOK FOR PART TWO OF The Gifts: A true story.
From the first moment that I held the ancient crystal skull known as Synergy, I could feel something unbelievable: its strong and vibrant spirit. It surprised me how independent it felt. And yet, at a certain point, I realized that I could also feel other distinct and strong beings connected to it: beings that were connected to crystal skulls.
I'd seen, but never touched another ancient crystal skull and I wasn't sure about what I was experiencing. The energy pattern as a whole, reminded me of an
upside down tree with crystal skull beings in the places where leaves would normally grow. There were many forks and branches, all connected to a “trunk” that reached up and into other planes, rooted somewhere beyond this reality in time and space.
It also seemed to me that there was a great Being that watched over and nurtured the entire "upside down tree"...but that is another story.
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I’ve never been fully satisfied with that description of what I sensed. Who ever heard of an upside down tree of crystal skulls? But the impression was strong enough that it stuck in my head. I still don’t have a better way to describe what I saw...what I experienced... even after over two decades of living with, learning from, and working with Synergy.
NOTE: There IS a tree that looks like it grows upside down: the baobab tree. There are several stories about how it came to be, however, none of them have anything to do with crystal skulls!
My favorite saying about the baobab tree is this: “Wisdom is like a baobab tree; no one individual can embrace it.” That could also be applied to the study of crystal skulls: no one person has all of the answers or can fully comprehend what they are, or what they can do.
Essentially, the “branches” of the "upside down tree" are connections and they form a network on the Earth. Each crystal skull that's been carved correctly and is “activated” joins this network. Ancient or contemporary, and anything in between, when a skull enters this network it ties into a worldwide system of love, compassion, and hope.
Synergy speaks for itself, and its twin, Harmony when it says: “It is our wish that we work together to combine talents and energies to create a situation for humanity, and other beings, to begin to raise their vibration/frequency to the next level, if they choose to do so.”
The crystal skull network is a structure that assists this happening. It is also there to help "mitigate Earth changes."
Synergy is the name that this crystal skull is known by, during this period of time on the Earth. It has had other names, in other times. Its oldest known name is “Flame of Life.” This name is still in use by the tribe that Synergy's twin, Harmony, aka “Song of Life” lives with.
Synergy is more than a name - it would be more accurate to say that this is the quality of the energy that this crystal skull manifests or broadcasts, on the earth, at this time. That statement implies that it has manifested other qualities, in other times.
The word “synergy” is defined as the working together of two things (muscles or medications for example) to produce an effect greater than the sum of their individual effects. Then, 1 + 1 can equal something larger than 2. We could say that all crystal skulls and the humans working with them are synergistic in this way. We can work together for the greater good and when we co-operate, we can do far more together than any one of can do alone.
My dear friend Dr. Jaap van Etten wrote a book entitled “Gifts of Mother Earth: Earth Energies, Vortexes, Lines and “Grids.” In it, he writes about the part these energies have played in human development. It is his belief that ancient humans truly understood the importance of the Earth's energy grids and networks. He is an expert on this subject and if you want to know more about these ideas, I suggest you read his book! The substance of what he's written agrees with what Synergy has told me concerning the role of crystal skulls at this time on the Earth.
In ancient times man created structures such as pyramids and temples and placed them strategically in various sacred places around the world. These places were at spots with energy vortexes and other important points that connected ley lines and other lines and grids of the Earth. They also created energy lines by placing these sacred structures at key points on the Earth's surface. Each stone in the structure was activated to the highest level possible. (Some stone structures that occur naturally are also fully activated and act in the same way.) They served several purposes, one of which was to hold and help maintain and stabilize the Earth’s energies and its grid systems, so that mankind and other beings could survive on this planet. These energy grids must be intact to some minimal degree or humans cannot live on this planet.
Over the millennia, humans have spent lifetimes tearing down sacred structures, and broken large sections of this energy grid system that held the Earth energies stable in key areas. We have done stupid and egocentric things to gain power, and fought endless wars that left broad swaths of the energies damaged or destroyed.
There are barren places where dark magic was used in times past. The worst damage is often in areas like cities and power plants; we have generated huge amounts of electromagnetic energy in frequencies that are harmful to humans, plants, animals, and other beings that most people don't even notice.
We have pillaged and plundered the bounties of our beautiful Earth and we continue to build without regards to the energies.
Synergy says that at this point, humans alone cannot directly fix these energy grids; we don't know enough anymore. However, we can help the beings that are working to help us.
How Can We Help?
One of the most important things we can do is to raise our spiritual awareness and vibrations. We can become more loving and compassionate beings: to one another and to all other beings. We can come together in ceremonies of love and gratitude, and as we do this together, we create very large resonant fields of energy, composed of harmonics of pure love. This is a frequency that the Earth can use for its needs. It sounds so simple, and it is. It is also very, very powerful. This will help the entire planet and everything on it.
We can also “activate” our crystal skulls to the highest level that is possible. When we do this, they join the worldwide crystal skull network and create a new energy connection. We don't have the super large, fully activated, energetic structures of ages past, but no matter the size, each individual crystal skull - as long as the inner energy matrix is intact - holds its share of the vibration/frequency and this can help to stabilize the planet's energy grids. These crystal skulls can act like jumper wires bridging damaged areas.
NOTE: I share more about “activating a skull” in another blog post.
We are not alone
We must also become more aware of the other Beings who inhabit this planet, both the "seen and unseen." The ones we can see are self-explanatory: animals, plants, and all of the other physical beings.
Then there are the "unseen." Our mundane world is surrounded by other planes of reality that humans are mostly unaware of. We live side by side, and intertwined with, other intelligent forms of life that are not physical in the sense that we usually understand the concept. There are other living beings that also call the Earth home, but that are mostly "unseen."
When your crystal skull is "Activated" and loved, it will attract these Beings of brilliant light, that have bodies that vibrate at just slightly different frequencies than humans.
They embody a separate evolution than that of humanity and include any of the "spiritual forces" such as Elementals, Nature Spirits, Faeries, and many, many others. Known by various names throughout history, they have been called Devas and Devatas, or simply the “Devic Kingdom.”
I believe Synergy when it says that the crystal skull network could help mitigate the issues with Earth energies, but by itself, that network is not enough. We also need the other beings to agree to help us. We do not have a good track record of working with them, or keeping our end of an agreement... but some are willing to try. If we treat them right, more may decide to assist.
The word Deva is from the Sanskrit language, simply meaning "a being of brilliant light" or "shining one" and is used to indicate a non-physical being.
Used in this context, the name Deva is a kind of classification, referring to any of these other beings who are connected to Nature and the Earth. Some are immense, and others are tiny; there are trillions of them.
None of them should be underestimated or reduced to trivial, "cute little guys." These beings are experts on the laws of nature, of physics, and of the formative and structural energies that created this planet.
Early on in our relationship, Synergy explained to me how important these Nature Beings are to the crystal skull network and to the Earth itself. They are adept at working with intense, high frequency subtle energy and can shape and transform those energies into something that can be utilized to "feed into" and support the subtle energies of all physical Beings, including plants, animals, and humans - if they choose to do so.
These Beings are hardworking healers who know more than any human scientist about the DNA of every living thing, as well as the inner workings of everything on this planet.
Plus, these Devic Nature Beings are particularly aligned with the vital energies that flow throughout this world through the various grids and energy lines. They oversee and care for the entire planet, working with other Beings to bring those energies directly to the Earth herself. They are the custodians of forests and jungles, mountains and deserts, rivers and streams, oceans and continents, etc. They easily work with electricity and all types of radiation - and all other natural, (and some not so natural) processes of this world.
These Beings help to keep our world in balance energetically – and with the grid systems currently in such poor condition, they literally make it possible for the physical entities such as humans and animals to live on this planet. Numerous ancient writings say that with "God's influence," these beings help to sustain the world.
At a time when the earth energies are in a terrible state, these beings are not something we can afford to ignore, even in a Culture that doesn't believe they are real. Humans have treated them poorly in ages past, and are scarcely better now. The more people who are aware of them and show them respect, the more likely they are to want to assist us in surviving as a species.
For example, it would take just one old and powerful Elemental who is willing to help, to purify a large part of any body of water. That's just one way they are absolutely vital. They could do some amazing things…things that could give us humans some time… time to mature as a race… time to develop more respect for each other… and time to fully appreciate Mother Earth and all of the other beings we share her with.
Soon after Synergy came into my life I began to understand the potential importance of a Crystal Skull Network.
I live my life with the understanding that on the Earth plane the concept of “Thought, Action, Manifest” is the rule. We can’t just think about something happening and then expect it to happen. When we are in a physical body we have to do something in order to get something. We don't just think a paycheck into the bank! There are ways to manifest what you want, but all of the ones that work consistently require some effort. They require you to BE the energy that you want to manifest.
The first year Synergy lived with me, I realized that I would have to make major life changes if I actually wanted to support the energetic Network – and Synergy.
In 2001 there were not very many crystal skulls available, so the first thing I did was set out to find some good carvers willing to make me more crystal skulls.
At that time I had five gift galleries and more importantly, great contacts in the gem show and "rockhound" world. I've known many of the top vendors since the early 1970’s and whenever I could, I had helped quite a few of them. As a result, I had some good friends in the rock world. I went to the ones I hoped might help me, and asked them to carve me some crystal skulls. It took me a few years, but an increase in production of good quality skulls became a reality.
Meanwhile I had to make people more aware of crystal skulls. Before it was a “thing” I started paying for my ad about crystal skulls to be in the top three of Google searches for crystal skulls, spirituality, meditation and other targeted searches.
I chose to advertise crystal skulls in general, and what they could offer – and not to focus on Synergy and I. Maybe that was a mistake financially, but it wasn’t a mistake to the crystal skull world. I have supported the entire crystal skull network, whether or not I knew the humans involved personally. I support the people and businesses who work with and sell quality crystal skulls that are carved carefully and with respect.
But I do not support the businesses that pay young children (usually girls under 10 years old) a few cents a day to carve skulls.
The kids learn to carve beautiful skulls at a cheap price – the financial price someone pays for a skull is low, but the cost is high when you consider the health of the child who carved it. Many, if not most, get sick from breathing the dust created from carving in a poorly ventilated factory where they work and may also live. Some of them die, other are left with damaged organs.
Those companies are now the top producers and sellers of crystal skulls. It’s none of my business what people decide to do, including where they want to purchase a crystal skull from, however, I will not offer any skulls from these places. There is a lot more to that story, but that’s the gist of it.
Since Synergy came I've lived frugally, spending most of my time, money and other resources obtaining contemporary carved crystal skulls that have intact inner energy matrices. I’ve dragged my daughter, Jaimee, along with me on this journey.
We spend a good deal of time each year hunting down crystal skulls that will hold the "Synergy Energy" vibration. Synergy then charges them with that ancient energy… When they are ready to go out, we list them on the internet. Then we take the money that comes in and do it all over again. Jaimee and I have sent many thousands crystal skulls to their “Keepers” in places all over the world. It’s a lot of work and there’s just the two of us doing the day to day things required to keep all of the “balls in the air.”
Even though it wasn't a great financial move for me to make, I truly believe that building up the crystal skull energy grid is a worthwhile thing to do, or I wouldn't continue to do it. Money is far from everything, and not a one of us can take it with us at the end of our lives.
Let me be clear that it's not only crystal skulls that Synergy, Jaimee and I offer that can be significant!
Any crystal skull that has been carved correctly, and most importantly, with respect and care, has the potential to be a part of this network! No matter where it came from, your crystal skull can be an important part of this network!
Love is an essential part of working with a crystal skull - and with the Network. It's important to the energy of the crystal skull, and to the Being that may be inside your skull (or other crystals) that you touch your skull with love and respect, every time. Your skull will reflect it back at you – every time.
I hope you'll think about joining us in the creation and expansion of the Crystal Skull Network!
I've been writing and re-writing blog posts, I've pulled some of the old ones to update... and have been working on getting new ones up soon so be sure to check back regularly!
Until we meet again in person... Don't just look for the blessing, BE the blessing!
--Sherry
If you do Readings for a long enough time, you will inevitably experience something truly shocking: you will - for certain - do a reading that is so off base that it totally stinks. In fact, your reading might be so bad, so wrong, and so completely off track that you feel like an absolute failure. This reading will bring up a ton of insecurities, fears and doubts that you didn't even know you had.
Some people throw away their deck and completely stop doing readings when they do an awful one. And it can go on from there for others: some get angry at or make fun of other people who still do Readings - and others turn their back on anything that might remind them of their "failure."
This kind of experience can affect you deeply; the entire experience can be dreadful and even throw you off your path. It may change you in unpleasant ways.
Or, you may have another kind of shocking experience.
One day you do a reading that is so perfect and so accurate, that your client is totally amazed. She thanks you profusely and may even talk in hushed tones to others about your incredible psychic gifts. That is the kind of reading that can fill you with awe and pride at how well you did.
This kind of experience can affect you deeply; the entire experience can be dreadful and even throw you off your path. It may change you in unpleasant ways.
Notice I said the same thing about both experiences? That's because both lead to head on collisions with your ego and with your shadow self. Your shadow is a murky part of yourself that you have worked hard at hiding or ignoring. When you do a crappy Reading, the first shock happens: you fold and go into full blown, poor me, "victim mode." Instead of working harder on your skills, and your ability to detach so that you can be there for your clients, you only think about yourself, and what a huge, embarrassing failure you are.
When the second shocking thing happens, it's seems completely different. You are feeling great; confident and "in your groove." You gave a breathtaking reading for your client and they were totally impressed! You begin to feel more certain of yourself as a gifted Reader, (Medium, Channel, etc. - fill in the blanks.) You start to have loyal "clientele" and soon have a long waiting list to be seen.
How could that be a negative? It’s not - unless it goes too far.
People start talking about how amazing you are, and how it's obvious that you are more gifted than the other Readers in your area. It’s incredible how you are able to pull unbelievable details right out of the air, effortlessly! You start to realize that someone with your high vibration needs to have things "just right" in order to keep the energy clear when you are doing Readings. You can’t work next to someone who doesn't have as high a vibration as you do so you tell the organizer that you need a different place - or that the other Reader needs to move. Of course they understand that someone like you has certain needs, in order for you to do your best work. It's only right...right?
When doing your spiritual work with others, be sure to do your own work!
Oops. You’ve bought into the hype that people say about you. You are a super special soul who is healing the world, so you deserve special treatment. Your "gifts" give you the right to act this way.
You forgot to give any real thought about how others were inconvenienced or disrespected by your “needs.” At its root, this thinking and behavior has the same cause as when you blew that long ago reading: the ego.
I've seen kind and gifted people start out doing a lot of good for others, and for themselves – and then get stuck. This has happened, and will happen, to every one of us, over many lifetimes. It seems especially true for people who really want to be on a spiritual path - We get tested.
It's unpleasant to look at and very uncomfortable to process, but it's also a very valuable part of everyone's journey. Dealing with our discomfort is how we grow emotionally and spiritually.
The Universe will eventually call you on this thinking and behavior. It's a good idea to call yourself out for behaving this way, before it happens when you least expect it.
If you can't do a reading in less than ideal circumstances, then that is on you. If you're reading at an event that seems too hectic where you are, then ask if it's possible to move - without making a drama about it. Don't show up in a shared venue and then put it on anyone else to change what they do, or who they are, in order to make you feel more comfortable. If you have a hard time reading in those chaotic circumstances then be honest with yourself and find somewhere that fits you better: it’s healthy to take care of yourself.
If you are so empathetic that you can't stop "picking up" ambient emotions and energies, then you are likely crippled to some degree. Being sensitive is a gift in some situations, but it can also be a serious weakness and vulnerability. Learn to build up your energy field, how to protect yourself and how to clear and release your issues. Get stronger, and learn to detach! Being empathetic and sensitive isn't a blank check, or an excuse, to act out or expect people to cater to you. Healer, heal thyself!
When doing your spiritual work with others, be sure to do your own work!
Take the time to be honest with yourself: breathe, clear yourself and deal with your emotions and your energy. Use your chosen tools and use them a lot! You’ll gather experiences and wisdom – then you'll no longer feel like an utter failure, when you have an "off day."
And when you are amazing – and you will be - you'll no longer be captivated by what others think about your "gifts.” Keep learning, keep growing - and keep laughing at yourself. It will help you to find joy in what you do and who you are; laughter raises your vibrations, easily and effortlessly.
Go out there and be incredible!
You will not always be right on: just do the best you can, every time - and then, move on. Your readings, and your life, can still be incredible, even when they are not perfect every time...and that's perfectly OK.
When doing your spiritual work with others, be sure to do your own work!
Always ask the deva in the stone or crystal if they are willing to help you.
After you think about your intent for a bit, pick up the crystal, stone or crystal skull and look at it. Turn it over and over in your hands, admiring it...love it.
Finally, hold it firmly in both hands (unless it's fairly small and you feel would fit more comfortably in just one hand, that's also fine.
Keep the thought of what you wish to work with in mind, as clearly as possible.
Now I'm going to teach you a simple technique that will be helpful in many other spiritual exercises and undertakings you may decide to take on.
Breathing with the crystal, skull or stone is a simple, effective way to connect to it.
This is a technique that comes from the Real People, the tribe Synergy's twin, Harmony, lives with.
It is commonly used with crystal skulls, but can also be used with any stone or crystal.
You can work with any shape or kind of stone or crystal in this way.
Even people who have worked for years with all manner of stones and crystals will find that they can unlock a new layer by breathing with them.
Let's try this exercise now. As we do, I may refer to what you are holding as a skull, but remember, you can use any shaped stone or crystal. It IS especially effective with the skull shape, because of how that shape works with the human energy field.
We have a very simple intent right now: for the crystal, stone or crystal skull to help amplify our clarity.
If you have clarity then you can figure all kinds of things out.
Close your eyes and begin by breathing slowly and deeply for about 3-4 breaths.
NOTE: Be sure you are holding your skull, stone, or crystal firmly in either both hands, or in just the left hand, if it is very small. Keep the thought of what you wish to work with in mind, as you continue to breathe.
Now I'd like you to bring thoughts of someone or something that you love into your mind and into your heart.
Pretend or imagine that this someone or something you love is right in front of you and you are ready to give them a hug.
Take another breath and bring them close to your heart, breathing in the love you have for them. Allow that love to open your heart to whatever degree is appropriate and natural for you, at this time.
Continue to breathe for another for 3-5 breaths.
Next, take a moment to Ground your energy, at the base chakra.
Put your attention on the base of your spine, on your root chakra. It's often perceived as a bright, clear red, like Jello.
Now pretend or imagine that you have a long cord (or perhaps roots, like tree roots) coming out of the base of your spine and going down deep into the ground, securing you to Mother Earth.
You are totally secure, and this connection allows you complete freedom of movement both physically and energetically.
Now take a moment to bring thoughts of something or someone that you are grateful for, into your mind and into your heart... and focus on feeling the emotion of gratitude.
And just continue breathing… slowly and deeply
Now pretend or imagine you are taking a sip of clear, cool, clean water; the water represents clarity.
The clarity of water fills every molecule of your body.
(You may wish to have some water handy to actually take a sip at this moment.)
Now, bring the skull close to your face, and slowly begin to breathe into the face of the skull.
Breathe right into the face of the skull, and then, when you inhale, breathe in deeply from the skull. Continue this for about one minute.
The stone, and the deva, receive your energy through your breath. They take in the energy and then send it back, intensifying and amplifying it.
(A skull shape is especially effective in this process, as the inside back of the skull acts as a kind of "satellite dish" or mirror, reflecting or "broadcasting" the energy of the intent back to the person who is connected with it.)
After you have this "loop" set up, you can set the crystal or skull down near you and it will continue broadcasting the "message" until you change it, by doing the same process over and over again.
This can last for a few weeks, or a few months, depending on the clarity and strength of your intent.
The "Best Way" to work with Crystals and Stones
I think that the ‘best way’ to feel the energy of various crystals and stones, and to discover more about them, is to simply get some stones and do whatever you feel like doing with them!
Seriously, just sitting and looking at your stones may be perfect for you.
How you interact with your crystals and stones will be different for everyone and is perfect for each of you. Hold them, talk to them, put them in patterns, carry them around, display them on shelves, wear them, give them away, etc. Do what feels natural and appropriate to you.
Articles, books and such are a starting point; there are useful ones, and there are some that basically just collect dust.
Finally, it's a matter of personal taste whether you love the "rough" natural specimens, or are drawn to smoothly polished stones and carvings, above all, enjoy and love your crystals and stones! You will receive far more from them than you ever realized you could, if you are open to the possibilities.
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Here's an example of something you can try at home.
First, make a clear and simple statement, or declaration, of what you want, as if it is already happening, right now.
"I am open to receiving and recognizing Guidance in my life."
Now let's break it down, so you can think about what that might mean to you.
This step will help you to make and hold a clear, simple intent.
Here are some things that might be helpful to think about; you may have others.
-What would it "look like" if you could receive and recognize things that make up your "Guidance?"
-Your Guidance could include:
Anything your Guide(s) point out to you or bring into your awareness.
Anything coming from your High Self, and into your awareness.
A heightened awareness of your "sense of knowingness."
Dreams you might have - even fragments that may stick in your mind.
-Now think about these things:
Where will you be when "it" starts to happen?
What will you be doing?
How will you feel when you realize this is happening?
What will it take for you to know for certain that it is happening?
OK! You have a nice crystal or a crystal skull! What comes next?
Here's a few insights and some things you can try with your crystals and crystal skulls.
Some important things to know about working with a crystal skull: they do things with your energy!
Many Crystal Skull researchers and workers agree that crystal skulls have the potential to do certain things with energy, when carved properly. Crystal skulls are tools of awareness. Although the exact words used below might not be universally used by each researcher, the concepts are solid.
We can say that a properly carved skull can:
Focus Energy
Reflect Energy
Refract Energy
Amplify Energy
Attune Energy
Transmit Energy
Transform Energy
Store Energy
and they may...Act as a Witness
This means that Crystal Skulls are potentially very powerful tools of Spiritual Awareness.
Crystal skulls amplify energy. That is something anyone working with a crystal skulls knows and knows pretty quickly. So... what do they amplify when you are working with one?
If you have no specific intent or thought of what you want when you are working with one, (or even when you are around one for very long) then they will tend to amplify the strongest underlying (and usually unresolved) emotional issue.
This could be great for those of us who want to develop our self-awareness. Just be aware that you could feel uncomfortable - even very uncomfortable for a while. You might feel emotional, overwhelmed... upset, aggressive, angry, anxious.... euphoric, giddy, peaceful, joyful... any kind of emotion is possible.
They don't make you feel anything - they might amplify it, though.
It's your responsibility to know that they could do this, and to be prepared. What could you set your intent on with you start to work with a crystal skull, knowing that it will amplify that intent?
I suggest starting by setting your intent to have more clarity. When you start out, and even at many points during your life working with crystal skulls, If you try to be more complicated in what you want them to assist you with, you may trip yourself up. The subconscious is very literal and you have to know how to 'talk' to it to get it to cooperate.
Crystal skulls, at a certain level, are simply taking your intent and amplifying it - they are not yet doing anything else with that 'vibration.'
So, keep it simple!
Clarity is a simple, yet extremely powerful, concept. It can help anyone in a variety of situations to have clarity. IF you have clarity, then you have a priceless tool for spiritual and emotional growth.
Lots of people try to increase their psychic abilities. You probably already have some abilities, but perhaps you wish you had more. Work with what you have first and make the most efficient use of them! Almost certainly, as a Human Being, you will have times when you lack clarity. What do you do to figure out what the heck something might mean, (like a dream) when it happens?
Increase your clarity and you will be able to see the next step! Your own Desires and Fears will interfere with your clarity. That's because you are human. Practice self- honesty so you understand your own motivations and desires - and to look at your fears. We all have them. It's nothing to be ashamed of.
Learn to be grounded energetically and most important - open your heart chakra to whatever degree is appropriate and natural and correct for YOU. Clarity is the key!
Crystal Skulls Reflect Energy
Let's speak about honesty. I feel that it's important to be rigorous and persistent with self-honesty - especially when you are working with a crystal skull. They will bring up your deepest feelings and amplify them. They will Reflect them back to you.
I said it might be uncomfortable... it also might be a little scary, at times, to take a hard look at yourself. But Crystal Skulls do much more than amplify energy! They are tools for your spiritual awareness! Keep in mind that a crystal skull could help you transform any emotions that come up, also.
Also remember that just because a thought comes into your head doesn't mean it is true. Don't just dismiss it, but take a close look at it.
Your own Desires and Fears will interfere with your clarity. That's because you are human! And because we are all human and have inner conflicts and defense mechanisms that protect us from seeing some things that are painful. We have to be willing to face ourselves in a very honest way when we look into the face of a crystal skull.
Our inner experiences and our outer experiences must be in alignment or we may fall into delusion. IF you have an experience that shows that you were initiated into an order of adepts but you have not done any real studying in this life then something is amiss. You may have gone through this in another life but you still have to bring things into alignment in this life through your own actions and work, or it will not be very useful. In other words just because you heard a voice or had a vision doesn't mean it's true or possible in this time and place.
Make sure that you have other evidence in your own outer life that you are correct. Anything that is true will be echoed in several different ways and situations in the outer world. Perhaps through things other people say to you, or books. Or even in a class that you take.
You can't discount the fact that other people have very similar experiences with crystal skulls. I do not discount subjective experiences when there are so many that tend towards being the same all over the world. If there isn't some truth in this, then why are so many experiences with people who do not know each other very similar? Yes, there can be mass delusions, but it's worth keeping an open mind anyway.
If crystal skulls are real and they really are tools of spiritual awareness then why should we be afraid to take a hard and honest look at our experiences with them?
Many people are afraid of this idea or process of taking a hard look at their own spiritual or psychic experiences. They are afraid they may not hold up under scrutiny, or might be incorrect. Maybe because they fear they are making things up. Maybe you are making it up - and maybe you aren't - but if you are too afraid to test the things that you experience then you will never know.
I think it's better to know. But I admit that I have a bias about this because I have spent many years as a research subject for various physicians and scientists dealing with research on psychic phenomena. I am not afraid to look at myself anymore.
Many metaphysical areas of interest are filled with people who make predictions that don't come true or pronouncements that can't be tested and don't seem to work very well. Their channeling or announcements may sound good at the moment, but if there is nothing but emotion driving it then maybe we need to step back and think about it before we jump on a bandwagon. Please do not give your own personal power to anyone or anything, including a crystal skull. That's not spiritually sound in any way.
Not every crystal skull is ancient. That's just reality. But so what? No crystal skull needs to be ancient in order to be a very powerful tool of spiritual awareness. They are good enough as they are - and so are you! You are perfectly good the way you are!
So now you know that one amazing thing about crystal skulls is that they do bring up emotions and thoughts. But they do more than just amplify energy! Always remember that a crystal skull could help you transform any emotions that come up, also.
Work With Your Crystal Skull!
The first layer of working with any skull, including the ancient ones, is "to remember."
This is the first layer - and this layer has many other layers within it.
What you are to called to remember is who you really are. It's so easy to get caught up in the daily things and forget that each life is short and sweet, even with the difficulties.
The real you is a Being of Light. You are a Spiritual Being, inside of a physical body. Remember. ---Sherry Whitfield, Guardian of Synergy.
Here is one way for you to work with your crystal skulls:
This exercise, is “intent driven,” as are all exercises that utilize the subtle energies around us. When you start to act "as if" something is possible, your intent will start the process.
I like to prepare for any spiritual exercise by taking a minute or two beforehand to start relaxing a bit and opening my mind and heart to whatever degree is appropriate and natural for me, at this time.
I begin by bringing thoughts of someone or something that I love into my mind and into my heart. I imagine that the someone or something I love is in front of me and I am giving them a hug, drawing them closet.
NOTE: Pick someone or something simple, that you do not have a lot of issues with. It could be a pet or a small child… Someone or something that you feel the love with naturally enough to make you smile.
Take deep breath and breath in the love you have for this someone or something and allow it to open you heart to whatever degree is appropriate and natural for you, at this time. Give it a minute or so and allow your heart to open.
Now hold your skull firmly in either both hands or, if it is small, in just the right hand. Keep the thought of what you wish to work with in mind.
The crystal skull receives the energies via the physical body of the person holding it, absorbs the vibrations, then amplifies them and re-broadcasts them outwards. These amplifications are received by the chakra (or receptors) in the left hand and relayed up the arm, to the brain, to a gland called the hypothalamus and or the limbic system, impressing the vibrations on the sub-conscious mind. The energy continues on, moving down to the right hand, holding the crystal. The process continues in a loop, reinforcing itself. The skull shape is especially effective in this process, as the inside back of the skull acts as a kind of satellite dish, to broadcast the vibrations of the person using it. It will amplify your intent. I suggest you begin with the intent that the skull will amplify your clarity.
Bring the skull to your face and slowly begin to breath into the face of the skull. This is a South Pacific way of working with a crystal skull. Breath into the face of the skull, then inhale deeply from the skull. Continue this for about two minutes and then gently set the crystal skull down.
That's it! That an easy yet extremely effective way to begin working with a crystal skull! Even persons who have worked for years with crystal skulls will find that they can unlock a new layer by breathing with them.
The “Best” way...
When it comes down to it, see what feels correct to you. It's all about opening your heart and staying in a place of love. That's how you access the 'power' of any crystal skull.'
For me, one of the ‘best ways’ to feel their energy and discover more about them is to breath with them, then look at them in detail, turning them over and over in my hands. I open my heart and feel them.
Love them! Just
There is always more to learn - this is just a starting point.
Interact with them - and How you interact will likely be perfect for you.
Hold them, talk to them, breath with them, meditate with them, dream with them, place them in patterns, carry them around, display them on shelves, wear them, give them away, etc. And sometimes, just looking at your stones may be perfect.
Remember to carefully go over the list of things at the beginning of this that post on what Crystal Skulls will do with Energy - YOUR energy!
Ask yourself this...
What would YOU do with a tool that could really do something like what I have described?
You will receive far more than you ever realized you could, if you are open to the possibilities.
As you may know, I'm the guardian (or the 'Keeper' as Synergy's tribe says,) of the ancient crystal skull known as Synergy. This is not the 'real' or sacred name of the skull, which is rarely written down. Rather, the name 'Synergy' describes the frequency that the crystal skull transmits.
What does the word Synergy mean?
Synergy is defined as the cooperative action of two or more independent entities, to bring about a total effect or change which is greater than what either can accomplish alone. In other words 1+1 = 3 or even more. What you and I together can do together is potentially so much more than what either of us could do alone. That seems very simple to understand!
This kind of energy isn't limited to one crystal skull emanating that frequency. In fact, I think that all crystal skulls, ancient and contemporary alike, are synergistic – in that they work together in a higher form of cooperation, without competition, for the greater good of humanity and the other Beings on this planet.
Cooperation is something we sorely need on this planet.
There is another way of looking at a form of synergy, historically. In some religions, the concept of “Synergism” seeks to reconcile two paradoxical truths:
The absolute power of God to change a human being, versus
The importance of humans taking responsibility for themselves and their actions; using their Free Will.
The idea of Synergism emphasizes how God and man can work together to accomplish great spiritual changes. It stresses the importance of using our conscious, Free Will to act in concrete, consistent ways, in accordance with sacred principles which support the spiritual growth of ourselves and others.
We decide to act. This allows our lives to flow more harmoniously, and with less conflict, as it is easier to receive inspiration and Guidance. Our free Will is not a stumbling block. It is the defining characteristic of the Universe itself.
Humans have the ability to apply their free will in order to align themselves with God’s Will -- and to choose to do the right thing. Not out of fear of a great and terrible God, but because it is their choice to do a right thing.
Surrendering to a Higher power does not mean that a person’s Will is inactive; it is simply that we are resisting our own weaknesses. In other words, the Creator draws us towards It -- but It draws only those who are willing. Spiritual emotion is not forced upon our Will as though we were statues. We accept it, and then, choose to act upon it.
"Holy Spirit moving;
Mind, in the act of thinking;
Will, not resisting.
Rather...
Complying,
When touched by the Divine."
I find this very intriguing and inspiring.
People who come to spend time with Synergy often have questions to ask.
One common question is "What is truth?" or "What is the meaning or purpose of my life?"
Synergy always answers them in a similar way:
"When one asks to be shown “truth” and that person has not used any of their many talents that day, then they cannot expect to find it!"
"To find “truth,” to enrich your life and to raise your spiritual vibrations, begin by doing just one kind thing, daily, out of love alone. This must be done with the whole of your heart and with no expectations of receiving anything in return, not even feelings of pleasure and contentment - of feeling good about yourself for having done something good."
"When you have done this and made a habit out of it, then ask again ask for “truth” to be shown to you. And it will be. Your heart will have begun to truly open to others, and this will move you into the higher vibrations, where you will receive Guidance easily."
I've been working daily to make this behavior a habit, a tool and a focal point in my life. I have chosen to align my Free Will in this manner!
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I'd like to share an ancient way of working with a crystal skull. It is an ancient technique that I learned from the Real People, the tribe that Synergy's twin, Harmony, lives with in the South Pacific. Their ancestors have used this method for thousands of years.
First, let me remind you that Crystal Skulls are many things, but possibly most of all, they are amazing tools of spiritual awareness.
As such, they do several things with human energy:
Focus Energy
Reflect Energy
Refract Energy
Amplify Energy
Attune Energy
Transmit Energy
Transform Energy
Store Energy
That's a lot to think about!
Let's explore the idea that Crystal skulls amplify and reflect energy. That is something anyone working with a crystal skull learns pretty quickly. Or they should - because it is going to happen to you, if you are around crystal skulls.
I consistently meet people who think the skulls only amplify other people's issues, not theirs. That makes no sense and I've never seen any evidence that's true. The capability to amplify is not personal.
Of course Synergy amplifies my issues and then reflects them back at me. We all have issues that can come up and trigger us. And there is nowhere to hide when you live with an ancient crystal skull!
I do not enjoy this, but I AM grateful for the opportunity to face my issues when they come up. I know that when I am honest with myself about what is happening and how I am feeling - then I can deal with things as they come up.
Keep this in mind - because contemporary crystal skulls have the potential to do the same things! These things are either true and they happen - or they don't. If they don't then forget about it - but if they do, then it's going to apply to you, too, so it's good to have some understanding of that. (Gravity is not selective either!)
So... what do they amplify?
If you have no specific intent or thought of what you want when you are working with one, (or even when you are around one for very long) then they will tend to amplify the strongest underlying (and usually unresolved) emotional issue. This could be great - or you could feel uncomfortable. You might feel emotional, overwhelmed... upset, anxious, peaceful, joyful, aggressive... any kind of emotion is possible.
Remember, crystal skulls don't make you feel anything, they only amplify it and then reflect it back at you. It's your responsibility to know that they could do this and to be aware and prepared.
Once you recognize what is happening, you can begin to process how you feel and then the emotions will become less intense. At that point it's easier to detach - and start thinking things through. It gives you the opportunity to face and then work with whatever triggered you to begin with.
If you want to go get the most out of this process, you can do a simple spiritual exercise (detailed below) that will help you to connect to your crystal skull more deeply, and allow you to have more control over what it amplifies and reflects, as well as begin to transform your reactions into understanding.
Instead of random, underlying, unresolved, emotional issues, what could you set your intent on the crystal skull amplifying?
I often suggest setting your intent on amplifying your clarity, to start with. This is useful at any point of a person's spiritual development.
If you try to be more complicated, you may trip yourself up. The subconscious is very literal and you have to be careful about what you say and how you say it to get it to fully cooperate. Keep it simple for optimal results!
Clarity is a simple concept. It can help anyone, in a variety of situations, to have more clarity. When you have clarity, then you have a priceless tool for spiritual and emotional awareness and growth.
Lots of people try to increase their psychic abilities. You almost certainly have some psychic abilities, already - maybe you would like to have more clarity on how to use them or how you can figure out what the heck something might mean - like a dream or a 'feeling.'
(Keep in mind that any and all of the various ways that crystal skulls work with subtle energy can also be called into play. For example, they can help you to Attune to higher vibrations. This makes them a very useful tool for working with High Frequency Beings like your Guides, Angels, etc.)
Here is an ancient way of working with a crystal skull.
Breathing With Your Crystal Skull
Below is the ancient technique for working with a crystal skull, that I learned from Synergy's tribe - The Real People. First, here are a few things that are helpful to know about the exercise.
You do not need to learn any new specialized skills.
The exercise is “intent driven,” as are all exercises that utilize the power of the subtle energies within us and around us. When you start to imagine and then act as if something is possible, your intent will start this process and your energies will follow your intent.
I prepare for any spiritual exercise by taking a minute or so beforehand to focus and open. I start by opening my mind and heart to whatever degree is appropriate and natural for me, at this time. Then I “ground” my energy. After that, I am ready for any spiritual exercise including breathing with a crystal skull. The entire exercise is below.
As you breathe into your crystal skull, you are sharing and co-mingling your Mana with the crystal skull's Mana.
(Among the Melanesian and Polynesian peoples, Mana is a personal, sacred force or spiritual essence/power. It is attributed to people, spirits, and some inanimate objects. Mana is also known as the Life Force, your Spiritual Vibration, Chi, Ki, Prana, your Aura, etc.)
Here is the full exercise:
Hold your crystal skull firmly with both hands, or if it is a small skull, just use your right hand. If it is a heavy skull, place it on a table, desk, or something similar and lean into the skull, so that your face is very close to it.
Keep the intent or thought of what it is that you wish to work on in your mind and bring your face close to the face of the crystal skull.
Close your eyes and begin by breathing slowly and deeply for about three or four breaths as you…
Relax your eyes
Relax your tongue
Relax your jaw
Drop your shoulders
Continue to breathe slowly and deeply… for about four or five more breaths.
Now I'd like you to bring thoughts of someone or something that you love into your mind and into your heart. Someone or something simple and uncomplicated… like a small child or a beloved animal. Take another breath in, and allow the love to fill your heart... and open your Heart Chakra to whatever degree is appropriate and natural for you, at this time.
Continue to breathe in that love for another three or four breaths.
Next, take a moment and place your attention on the base of your spine, on your Root Chakra. This energy center is often perceived as a bright, clear red – like red Jello! I’d like you to pretend or imagine that you have roots, like tree roots, coming out of the base of your spine and going down, deep into the ground, securing you to Mother Earth.
As they go down, deeper and deeper, let any tension you may have drain out of you… feel your roots sinking deep into the Earth, allowing a secure connection. You are safe and sound, and this connection allows you complete freedom of movement both physically and energetically.
Now, place your attention on the top of your head. Take a deep breath in and as you let it out slowly, pretend that your breath flows down your spine, and right out your roots. As you breathe, your energy follows your breath in through the top of your head, down your spine, and out your grounding roots.
This is an effortless and natural flow of breath and energy.
Continue to breathe like this three or four more times.
With your hands on your crystal skull (or if it is a small skull, just use your right hand), and keeping the intent or thought of what it is that you wish to work on in your mind, bring your face up to the crystal skull.
(Again, if you have no specific intent at this time, I suggest you focus on asking for an increase in your clarity. Clarity is simple, yet extremely powerful. If you have clarity, then you have a priceless tool for spiritual and emotional growth and balance. Increase your clarity and you will be able to see the next step to take!)
Take a deep breath in, and then breathe out and into the face of the skull. Now inhale deeply from the skull, connecting and co-mingling your breath and your Mana (your subtle energies) together with the Mana of the crystal skull.
Continue breathing with your crystal skull for a minute or so as you focus on what you'd like to work on.
When you are finished breathing with your skull, gently remove your hands and / or set the crystal skull down.
That's it!
This is an easy yet extremely effective way to work with a crystal skull!
Even those who have worked for years with crystal skulls will find that they can unlock a new layer, just by having a clear intent, and breathing with the skull.
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I often share about topics having to do with crystal skulls. Now I'd like to mention another aspect of spiritual work, known as 'Bear Medicine.'
Bear is in our lives to teach by example. She is willing to help us process our collected experiences in a more conscious and cohesive manner.
Bear goes out into the world and gathers experiences and all available information. She takes it back to her quiet place and then carefully studies what she has assembled.
Bear reaches her own informed decisions, based on what the facts of her experiences and studies have shown her. Then she allows whatever time is necessary for what she has learned to unify and blend into her overall understanding.
Bear Medicine teaches us to take time to process and integrate the experiences and insights that life brings, instead of rushing headlong into the next experience. In order to become "enlightened" one must take the time to process the information and experiences that one gathers in the world. Quiet time in the “cave” shows Bear what must be shed or released, so that she may move forward and grow.
Bear Medicine shows us what has been holding us back in our attempts to realize our dreams. These may be things from our past, or situations in our present. Recognizing what we have yet to work through may bring painful insights and it is often a long, and even daunting, undertaking; yet it is necessary for our spiritual and emotional growth and health.
If we ask her, Bear will assist us in recognizing and releasing that which no longer serves us.
Bear keeps her mind open, because when she ventures into the world, her experiences may give her new information that will alter her beliefs, yet again. Being flexible and willing to change is necessary for a Bear or a human to survive and thrive.
Bear is not one to make quick decisions, nor does she force anyone else into doing things. Bear accepts life and the other Beings around her as they are.
Bear reminds us that we should endeavor to experience life fully, and then allow ourselves the time to work through the lessons we have been given, so that they become useful tools for growth, rather than just raw stimulation.
Bear is compassionate, yet detached. Bear has no expectations of how things should be. Hers is a feminine, intuitive and receptive energy, in balance with the earth and all Beings on it.
Bear has been called the “Keeper of Dream Time.” She is said to store the teachings of dreams until the Dreamer “wakes up” to them.
Some have called this place of inner-knowing the Dream Lodge; Bear just calls it her cave.
However you imagine this place to be, it consists of a frequency of awareness; a state of mind where we recognize and begin to appreciate that we are all here for a reason, and that we each have a place in the world.
Ask Bear to help you to remember your dreams so you may begin to use them for your spiritual growth.
Bear may also help us take notice of places along our spiritual journey where we begin to awaken to the awareness that we are Beings of Light - and that death is a compelling illusion that is woven by our physical reality.
As Bear retreats to hibernate each year, she is “dead” to the outside world. Come Spring, she awakens to go out into the world once again, gathering new understandings.
Bear loves her home and protects the young and helpless. Bear often seems to be rather slow, but can move like lightning when she or her loved ones are threatened.
Bear shows one how to provide - and accept - healing. Bear knows that we must begin our own healing, in order to assist others in healing.
Bear reminds us that we should experience life fully - both the pain and the pleasure - and take the time to think about the lessons both have given us.
What have you learned from your pain?
What have you learned from your pleasures?
Learn from Bear and take your time as you open. Savor your life experiences and remember that you will open as you are meant to open. You cannot force anything.
She will be there to guide you as you process, understand and integrate them into your life, if you are willing.
Bear Medicine can help you to understand and assimilate the many lessons, experiences, insights that your Guides, Angels, Masters...and Crystal Skulls may bring into your awareness.
**I am certain that there are many interesting and in depth articles to be found elsewhere on the web, written about the concept of Bear Medicine. What I share here is what my Guide - and an Elder of the Ojibwe people taught me, when I was young.
My Grama was a smart and accomplished woman who was well ahead of her time. She had several careers throughout her life and was always learning and trying new things. A lot of the good in me, I got from her. She is the one who gave me my first tools at age three, and taught me how to use them to build and repair things. When I was too little to use a handsaw effectively, she put her hand over mine on her jigsaw and taught me how to steady it. She got me a secondhand sewing machine and we made clothes and found old furniture and reupholstered things together. She passed on her interest in anatomy and physiology, horticulture, a love of books, learning and dogs. She also gave me her sense of adventure that she’d never been able to satisfy. She knew what I loved - and what I feared. I had no idea that the most stable person in my life wasn’t stable at all. She was also an alcoholic.
I didn’t know much about what alcohol did to people. My parents didn’t drink often and the people I heard them refer to as alcoholics were obviously impaired - and impaired often. Grama drank beer. She didn’t drink every day, but when she did, she drank a lot. I didn’t know that an alcoholic could function so well. I’d certainly never heard the word in regards to her.
I did know quite well that she had a side that scared me, at times. I learned to watch her carefully to see which Grama would be waiting for me when I’d get home from school. Would it be the one who would laugh with me and teach me? Or would it be the mean one that she turned into after a few “cold ones?”
The understanding that Grama was an alcoholic didn’t come to me until I was in my early twenties. I’d gotten involved with a man who was funny and kind – until he started drinking. I heard about Al-Anon from his mother and went to a meeting. That’s where I realized that my Grama was a functioning alcoholic and I had picked a boyfriend who had a lot in common with her. I had a lot of the classic issues that an adult child of an alcoholic has.
The day came when I gathered my courage and sat down with her as an adult to talk with her about my concerns about her drinking, and the obvious affect it was having on her. She listened, but didn’t say anything. Instead, she walked over to the kitchen counter and picked up a large cast iron skillet; she tried to hit me over the head with it. Luckily, I ducked and she missed and cracked the countertop tiles instead. I think she would have killed me if she’d hit me. Shaken, I left the house in tears as she stood there silently. She and I never spoke about what happened that day again.
In therapy, I came to realize that as much as she loved me and tried to nurture me, she also tried to manipulate and control me. She didn’t want me to be independent or successful, especially in business; she was horrified when I opened my first store. She felt I was too sensitive and kind to be in business or out in the world, for that matter. She couldn’t visualize how I would function in the world as sensitive and compassionate as I was - much less with me talking to Joe, my Guide, seeing spirits, leaving my body, having dreams about people and the future…etc. etc. If it had been a different age, she would have put me into a convent – or an asylum.
(I call my Guardian Angel "Joe." He has been my Guide and constant spiritual companion since I can remember. I called him "Yes" when I was very small, because that was my favorite word. The name Joe was meaningful to him and I, so we settled on me calling him that when I was a teen. And that is another story…)
When I went on make a success of my stores and then got into the movie theaters and other businesses, Grama was confused that I did so well - in spite of my abilities. At times she was also angry and did things to try to sabotage me, thinking that she knew best. I wasn’t happy with her schemes, but I just kept going and ignored or side stepped whatever she’d try. There was no point in trying to talk to her; she would just stare at me like she did the day she picked up the iron skillet.
In therapy I’d become conscious of the fact that I’d inherited some very unhelpful patterns from my Grama, mixed in with the good stuff. A dysfunctional family with a lot of sad and sick secrets may not get along well or even like one another much, but they will often hold on tight to at least one family member, no matter what happens. I was determined to break those patterns, without breaking my love and appreciation for her. Yes, Grama had a lot of faults – nevertheless - I loved her with my whole heart. I’ve never met a perfect person - we are all mixed bags.
I understood why she thought as she did; she’d grown up dirt poor in a man’s world, fighting for every bit of success she’d had. She had to be tough to survive and she often confused kindness for weakness. Her integrity was elastic - something that shocked me, even as a child. She once told me that “doing something ‘wrong’ isn’t wrong, if no one sees you do it.”
I replied “But Grama, God always sees what I do – and so does Joe - I don’t want to do wrong things.”
That conversation supported her belief that I was too honest and too fragile - and was therefore fundamentally incapable of surviving the cruel world without her.
Even at 10 years old I knew Grama was mistaken about me; yes, I was kind, but I was also stronger than she realized. I was independent and stubborn about being honest - in a family where honesty was not valued. It seems odd to me now, but I didn’t feel the need to prove myself to her or the others in my family. I did want them to love me, but I wasn’t sure they did. I was certain that they didn’t understand me well enough to have an informed opinion about who I was, so how could they judge me? I did fear them - and the inconsistency and various ways they could punish me.
I did want to prove to Joe - and most of all, to myself - that I could survive long enough to lead an effective life, doing my best to ascertain what the right thing to do was.
I grew up and got out. Although I made many mistakes, I took responsibility for them and moved forward. I continued with therapy and worked hard to recognize the dark and often hidden patterns that no one in our family openly talked about. I began to realize that I wasn’t like them - and felt relieved.
As an adult, I was making choices that were much different than my family; one choice was to be honest with myself about what had happened to me and stop sugarcoating it. I made everyone very nervous with that choice.
Was my love and attachment to my Grama a function of the dysfunction, pain and fear in my childhood? Yes, of course; she was an anchor for me. She had major issues, and I knew for sure she didn’t agree with me - but I knew for sure that she loved me even when her manipulation didn’t work. That’s a powerful bond in any family – and maybe even more so in a severely dysfunctional family. It’s also a potentially powerful complication.
Meanwhile, Grama was now in her late sixties; she was depressed that I didn’t need her like I had.
She began to go to the doctor a lot, asking for one test after another, insisting to him, and to me, that she was going to die soon.
She’d always been pretty healthy, except for the drinking - and at that point she wasn’t sick and the doctor told her so.
That was hard for her to accept and as a result, the meddling in my life intensified for a few years, until it became hard to overlook. I talked to her, but she just ignored me.
I realized she wasn’t going to change at this point; I did my best to engage her in other projects. I called her daily to check in and ask her advice on some business thing; I knew that helped her feel valued and loved. I drove the familiar twisting road over the Santa Cruz Mountains, to take her out for lunch or just hang out with her. I cherished those times after we found a “new normal.”
Then came a day when I walked into her mobile home and immediately saw something had changed. I took one look at her energy and put her in the car and drove her to her Dr. instead of going to lunch.
She had developed lymphoma. She was delighted at how quickly it was progressing; her spleen quickly grew to the size of a loaf of bread and had to be taken out. She was not happy that I wasn’t at the hospital for her surgery, but I had ended up in a different hospital at the same time, having a breast tumor removed. It was benign and we both went home to recover.
Grama did very well for seven or eight years. She slowed down a little, but was a feisty as ever - and still binge drinking. I found her a housekeeper to help with chores and she accepted the help for once. The time passed.
The Spring of 1981 was the most beautiful we’d seen in a long time. I went to her place one Sunday and weeded her little garden and replanted her flower boxes as she supervised. She seemed a little tired, but overall, about the same. Her doctor told us that she’d developed some anemia, still, she mostly seemed like her old self. I knew she’d been drinking before I got there, because she ended the visit arguing with me about something. I was uncomfortable with what she wanted me to do, but I didn’t want to upset her so I just agreed with her.
Two days later I woke up from a dream knowing that she was going to die very, very soon. I’d I called my mother and told her we had to go see Grama right away because it was almost her time. I had no evidence that this was true, but we all knew my dreams were almost always right. Taking no chances, I picked up Mom and we drove over the mountains to see her one last time.
I stood looking at her as she lay there, knowing I somehow had to say goodbye her. I was hanging on to her with all of my might. Her doctor said that things were more serious that they’d first thought; she had pernicious anemia and her body was quickly shutting down. He told me that he felt that the only thing keeping her alive was the bond between her and I.
I knew it was true and that it was wrong to try to hang onto her - but how could I let her go? I wasn’t ready.
I stayed up that night and prayed about what to do. Finally I decided to create a ritual to support me in letting go of her. I collected things that represented the many experiences and happy memories we had together. I put them in a beautiful box. I did my clearing and releasing exercises… then I buried some of the items and burned the others. I was determined that I would not hold on to her and delay her passing any longer. Finally, I cut our ties. I finished and went into the house, feeling numb.
Not much had time passed when Joe appeared and told me that she had passed about 6:30am. Within moments the hospital called to tell me the same.
Suddenly, I felt so alone and helpless. Grama had been the most dominant force in my life. What was I going to do?
Joe said to me, "Give your Grama to me, Sherry. I'll take care of her." Although emotionally devastated, I knew intellectually that the Soul that had been my Grama would never be her again; she had left her physical body behind and moved on. I needed to accept that and trust Joe. Trust that he would help her with her transition, in any way he could. I asked him how she was doing and he told me that she was with her sister, Maryanne. I had never heard of her having a sister with that name, but was I too upset to argue or question him.
Overwhelming and suffocating Grief – and Guilt
I can still see myself looking in the bathroom mirror that morning, brushing my hair. I was thinking,
"Here I am, combing my hair, as I do every day, and my Grandmother is dead. Nothing will ever be the same again, and I am just combing my hair." This was the first time in this life that I fully and completely realized that that life and the whole world go on, with or without us in it.
My Grama had made a final request of me on that last weekend; it was outrageous. She had me promise that I would carry her request out. I made that promise, knowing full well that I couldn’t keep it - my Mom was her heir, not me. Mom would never let me do as Grama had asked - and rightly so. My Grama was not in her right mind at the end.
I try my best not to break promises I make; certainly I wouldn’t make a promise that I knew I wasn’t going to keep. After she died, I felt tremendous and crushing guilt over making her a promise when I knew I was lying.
I focused on the feeling of guilt, instead of on the real issue of my sadness and grief. I felt cold and numb; I spent a couple of days sleeping too much and crying a lot.
Two nights after her death, I fell asleep in a recliner; I abruptly woke up at 3:11:11 am. I had had a vivid dream that my arm was on fire; it hurt so much that I expected to see blisters.
My Grama was born on March 11, 1911 - 3/11/11.
All of a sudden I was totally terrified. I was sure that this was a sign that my Grama was upset with me for not carrying out her final wishes; I was sure she had sent me the dream because she was angry. I became more and more certain that she was going to haunt me to punish me. I didn't sleep for the rest of the night; I sat there shivering, feeling very, very afraid.
The next day, I went with my Father to pick up Grama's ashes from the crematory. I got into his car holding that small box and I felt the utter lifelessness of the contents. Never before had I felt something so completely devoid of any energetic sensation. Nothing of my Grama was in there; not one bit of her subtle energy was in this box of ashes. I felt hollow and icy fingers of terror squeezed my chest.
As I looked out the car window, I had a hard time breathing as the renewed realization that everyone and everything that we know, love and work for, passes away, eventually. I thought I’d known that: I've been through death time and time again, life after life…but I learned it at a different level, while holding that little box.
It truly is "ashes to ashes, dust to dust" for each one of us.
I became fully aware in that moment that for me, life is only an empty existence if I have no faith, no hope, or no sense of wonder at life. Mine might not be what others think of as faith, but it had always been there. I felt my faith and my inner sense of joy wavering.
I took her box home and put it on my dresser and waited for the memorial - the memorial that she had begged me to cancel in her last lucid moments.
The day of her memorial dawned beautifully. There were about a dozen family members and friends gathered for the drive from my parents home in San Jose to San Francisco. We had two cars and we’d find places to park and then meet up on the Pier at Fisherman’s Wharf. Then we’d go out on the bay in a small boat to scatter her ashes in the water near Angel Island.
A friend drove my VW van that day, since I was in no shape to do so. Another childhood friend, Bill, went with me and we stood on the pier, waiting for the rest of the family to find parking spots and join us.
About 45 minutes passed, and no one came.
As I stood there, in the middle of a Saturday crowd at Fisherman's Wharf, holding a plain little cardboard box with my Grama's ashes in it, I was immersed in the total desolation of the bereaved.
I was still freezing as I again realized that, for me, life without my sense of hope, joy and faith was not worth living. I felt that I couldn't go on without it, and I couldn't imagine how I could restore it.
With no belief that I would be heard, I decided I would ask for a sign – not a sign that I would choose myself, but for something to happen that I could not mistake as being an answer or some guidance, once I saw it. Although I was very earnest, this was not a prayerful request; this was more like a challenge to God and/or to whomever heard me, including Joe, to prove there was a rhyme and reason for being alive.
By then it had been nearly an hour of waiting on the sidewalk on the Pier and Bill and I were getting worried. My normally prompt family was still nowhere to be seen. We were afraid that the chartered boat might get tired of waiting and leave without us so we decided to try and find the Captain of the boat and tell him to wait for us.
We walked around, checking all of the places that we could see where there were boats and pier numbers, but we couldn't find the exact Pier that we were supposed to be at. The crowd was pressing around us and I began to feel panicky. Then, I saw people with small boxes, just like the one I carried, boarding a boat up ahead of us. We ran to it and started to get on – but it was the wrong boat! It was a boat for people who had opted for a group Funeral. I'd never heard of such a thing and it was depressing.
Finally, we walked around the pier, to the back of a restaurant; I was intent on finding someone, perhaps a worker, to help us find our way.
Small Miracles
All of a sudden it became still around us and we stopped. A man was approaching from the end of a pier where I saw docked boats. The stranger walked right up to us, looking directly at me. He came close and stopped. He took his captain's hat off and said:
"My name is Joe. Sherry, give your Grama to me; I'll take care of her."
I was shocked and Bill looked like he was about to faint. I had told my family and close friends, including Bill, what MY Joe had said to me when Grama died. He said later that he’d thought for a moment that “my Joe” had materialized on the Pier and was about to take us out to sea.
I was flabbergasted by this stranger, but still without saying anything, I handed the box to the man and as I did, my family and friends arrived. Without delay, we all followed the new Joe onto a boat. I felt wooden and like I was dreaming.
As we were boarding, Bill told my family and friends what had happened.
Everyone was speechless and wondering what was going on. We sat down and the man came into the cabin and set the box down and turned to speak.
He said that he was the Captain of the boat we’d chartered to take my Grama out to the ocean that she'd loved so much. He turned to me and said he was sorry he'd startled me. He said he was a bit baffled and even spooked about why he had said those things to me and wasn't sure how he had known my name…but the words just came out of his mouth and felt right. He added that he was real sorry if he'd upset me.
We all assured him that it was OK, and someone said that sometimes strange things happen around Sherry. Dad said it had all worked out and we were ready to go. Captain Joe still looked a bit shaken, but he thanked us, shook off his "spooky feeling," and started making preparations to take us out onto the Bay.
As the engine was warming up, all of us sat in the cabin watching as Captain Joe opened the box and prepared to take Grama's ashes out, intending to put them into a silver urn.
He started opening and shutting cabinet doors, peering inside every cupboard in the cabin. After a minute or two, he told us that he was really sorry, but the fancy urn that he had brought on board had disappeared - and he couldn't imagine where it was.
We all looked at one another and began to laugh. The humble cardboard box was much more suited to my earthy Grandmother than a silver urn. We left her in the box, and I got up and placed a beautiful wreath of flowers around it.
We all thought we were ready to go, but right then, Captain Joe turned around, opened the box and reached his hand right into the ashes, fishing around.
We were shocked as he brought out some kind of a blackened metal medallion. It was something the State requires to be placed with a body at the time it is cremated. As he held it, he started babbling that he didn't know why he was doing this, because it wasn't legal to remove it. He said he felt he had to get it and give it to me, because he "knew" that Grama wanted me to have it.
Then he took my hand and put the medallion in it and looked into my eyes as he told me that my Grama loved me and would never be angry with me for anything for very long. He said repeatedly that she loved me more than anything and would never want me to feel bad at not being able to do the thing that she had asked me to do. He kept apologizing to us that he didn't know why he was doing and saying these things…as he repeated himself a few times. He was bewildered and begged us not to tell anyone that he had given the medallion to me, because it was against the law and he would be in trouble. He said that he had never done such a thing but felt that he must do this.
I knew why he did it. Everyone there knew why he did it; I’d asked for a sign and it all was happening so I could find peace and truly let go. This situation was a sign - and the disk was another tangible, physical sign. The disk was kind of gross, but it was something to hold on to from Grama.
It was so like her to do something like this. As I took the disk and turned it over I saw that there were numbers on it.
Captain Joe went into the pilot house and put the boat in gear, taking us out on the water, at last.
Joe had a microphone and as we motored over the waves, headed towards Angel Island, he pointed out things to see in the bay… and then he began to tell jokes. Some were off color jokes. It was a surreal and strange trip. Normally, this would have been quite inappropriate behavior for a man piloting a family to a loved one's last resting place. But somehow, it wasn't as inappropriate as it sounds now; none of us were offended, not even my very religious Great Aunt and Uncle. Rather, we were all struck with wonder.
Grama - a tiny, prim looking lady - got a big kick out of shocking people by telling a bawdy story or dirty joke. We all knew that somehow Grama was there, coming through this man to let us know she was doing fine and she didn’t want us mourning her or worrying about her.
Captain Joe took us out to Angel Island and when we were just off shore, he turned the boat around and cut the engines. The wind had come up and we were in fairly rough waters, but suddenly it became very still. We all went up on the deck. A bird flew above us in the blue, blue sky, as we scattered Grama's ashes into the sea that she so loved. We all threw flowers into the water and as we did, we each felt a peaceful joy come over us; we felt her presence with us in a such strong way, including (and maybe especially) Captain Joe.
It was an amazing moment. We all said a few words about Grama; most of us said something funny. When my Father started to speak he began to get very sentimental and morose, which was unexpected. Suddenly, the boat rocked violently three times and then all was still, again. Dad abruptly sat down and we agreed it was time to go.
It was just like someone had put their finger on the bow of the boat and pushed it down very deliberately, three times. We snapped out of our grief, all at once, and we began to feel better: almost weirdly light-hearted.
The little boat started back to shore.
When we were nearly back, Captain Joe said that he wanted to buy me a drink. This was an uncomfortable idea and I hesitated. I didn't know this Joe and my Grama was an alcoholic. However, everyone else said they’d come along, so we all went into a nice restaurant and I had a Coke with Captain Joe.
The poor Captain was quite shaken, saying that in all of his years and maybe 5000 trips with people's ashes, he had never felt any sort of a presence of a dead person before. He was mystified about the way he had acted - and he was embarrassed. But most of all, he was amazed and overwhelmingly curious to find out what I thought had happened and why it had happened.
As I talked to him, it quickly became clear to me that Captain Joe had recently begun to feel an overwhelming emptiness in his life; his job only seemed to intensify it. Day after day, he took grief stricken people on these funeral trips out on the Bay. He was divorced and lived alone, and he couldn’t imagine someone being around to take his ashes anywhere, when it was his turn. There seemed to be no point to his life anymore. He had gradually lost his faith in himself, much less some higher power; he was just coasting along. What had happened with us on his boat had left him with a hunger to know more. He felt that the day’s events had opened something inside of him and that his life was about to change. He was convinced that since I was the main recipient of the "messages" from Grama, that I could help him. He wanted me to shed light on his behavior and he didn’t want the experience and the day to end.
I told him a little about myself and "my Joe," and all that had happened after Grama died. I said that I thought it was Grama and Joe who had engineered this experience in order to help me, but that nothing happens in a vacuum and his own Guide surely had a major hand in it, also. I explained to him that I hadn’t made anything happen, but that I had asked for a sign.
I told him that I believed that he’d been part of a complex series of events that were an answer to a prayer I’d made. The situation had helped me deal with my deep grief and lack of hope, faith or joy after Grama's death - but I would bet that he had been open to it, at some level, or it wouldn't have happened.
I asked him if he thought it were possible that this experience was about more than the death of my Grama and my grief? Could it have also happened as an answer to a prayer or request that he had made for something?
He was taken aback, but said, that yes, he could agree that what had happened today really was the answer to something he’d been praying for
He said that he’d been surprised at all of the things he’d said and done and a little freaked out, but that he’d also enjoyed himself and had been filled with wonder.
I explained I had been taught by Joe that all things work together for the greater good and that this was a Spiritual principle of the Universe that Joe calls the Spiritual Law of Economy. We talked for another hour or so - and then I said it was time for me to get everyone back to San Jose.
Captain Joe was desperate to maintain contact with me and somehow continue the experience. He offered to take me back out to "visit" Grama anytime I wanted, free of charge. I kept telling him that it wasn't me that had caused the experience, but he was sure that I “had something special that could rub off on him.” He said that he felt like he needed to say in contact with me so that he wouldn't lose this feeling.
A friend of the family interrupted him at that point and he told him something like this:
"I know you want to just sit here and marvel at this experience as long as you can. You haven't felt it before and you don't want it to end. You're thinking that if you stay in touch with Sherry that it will happen again. All of us have felt that way at times around her and "Joe." But you can't hang onto her, or onto the experience. Sherry taught me that the only way for you to feel it again is to let it go, and then try to use this experience as a catalyst in your life, to open yourself to the unseen world."
My other friends and family all nodded their heads at this.
Of course I agreed, but I hadn’t even realized this friend or my family had paid any attention to things I’d said to him about this topic. It was a whole new kind of weird.
Captain Joe was unconvinced, but he could see I was ready to leave. We all said our good-byes and left him in the restaurant, sitting with his drink, mulling over what had happened to us all.
We thought that the experiences surrounding my Grama's death were over. But there were a few more revelations to come.
A day later, we were at my mother’s house where my Grama's younger sister was staying. As I’ve said, I had told everyone what happened with Joe the morning Grama died – including how he’d said she was with her sister Maryanne. My Great Aunt took a deep breath and said she had something to tell us that she'd sworn never to talk about.
Yes, they’d had a sister named Maryanne. She had died in infancy when Grama, as a two year old, had pulled a pot of boiling water down on top of her, causing her serious burns which ultimately killed the baby. In those days, it was common for children to die in early childhood, and we knew that there had been siblings that had died as infants, but not one of us could recall any relative mentioning that sister's name, or the exact circumstances of the death.
My Great Aunt said her name was rarely spoken and never mentioned in Grama’s presence, due to the horrible guilt she suffered over having caused her little sister's death. She, herself had not said the baby's name out loud since she was a child and she thought it was amazing - and comforting - that Joe had told me that Grama was now with their sister, Maryanne.
But that’s not all.
A few weeks later, I was at a fund raising dinner with my mother. She was talking to some friends about Grama's death and what had happened afterwards.
During the conversation, I mentioned the horrible nightmare I’d had about my arm being on fire, and waking up to see it was 3:11:11, her birthday. I talked about how terrified I’d been and how I was still processing some guilt I had about promising her something that I knew I would never do.
A woman we knew slightly was sitting at the same table and she interrupted us, apologizing that she'd overheard us talking She said "believe it or not I have something I can add to your experiences surrounding your Grama's death."
What in the world…?
She told us a startling story. She worked for the local crematorium and had had a bizarre experience of her own. It seemed that she had cremated a woman on the very night that we were talking about, at a little after 3:00am. She said remembered the cremation quite clearly - and that she’d felt a little "chilled" when she had handled this particular body. In fact, she said, she'd never forget it.
Why?
Well, this woman's name was Dorothy Smith.
My Grama went by the name Dollie, but her legal name was Dorothy Smith.
With one last twist of fate, this Dorothy Smith was the very person who cremated my Grama and put the cremation medallion I had into the box with Grama's ashes.
I spoke to Captain Joe several times after the incident. He called me, but I felt it was best that I didn’t take him up on his offer to go back out to Angel Island. He turned out to be right about the experience changing his life. He no longer did his job without a thought of, or a prayer for, the spirit of the person whose ashes he was carrying. He’d found himself a beginning point that day with us, where he could explore his own faith, in his own way. He said that he thought about Joe and I often and that because of us, he’d come to feel that his own Guardian Angel was with him always, guiding him back to a safe harbor.
I still have Grama's medallion and the numbers on it continue to speak to me, revealing new insights, even after all of these years.
I received my sign. It left me comforted, with a joyful hope; my sense of wonder has continued and intensifies again, each time I think of what happened over four decades ago.
I’m not far off now from the age my Grama was when she died; I’ve experienced too many other deaths that were devastating in that time. When I start to feel helpless and hopeless with grief, I only have to think back to the events surrounding Grama’s death.
I am reminded again, that our Guides and the other Beings who love us, do not turn away from us; we are the ones who turn away from them.
Many people have had priceless spiritual experiences that they can't explain – small miracles that can change their lives: when they allow them to.
It is indeed a mistake to try to hold onto those magical, mystical moments. Cherish them, and remember them - even analyze them - but also get on with your life, taking with you that mystery and sense of wonder.
The ability to be present within the moments of your life is also priceless.
Synergy doesn't offer many messages for the public. I am privileged to share them, when it happens.
"The Earth, and all of humanity, stands on the brink of great change, and only the smallest portion of this transformation will be obvious on the physical planes, to those who do not have the eyes to see it. It is necessary that those who have their spiritual eyes open to work together to bring about this awakening."
"Those who have a high state of consciousness are not immobilized into inaction by fear, brought about by disasters. Instead, they immediately start to make a plan to turn the negative into an opportunity to learn, grow and work together. When you are on the physical planes, it is your opportunity to develop Soul’s ability to handle the highs and lows of life with compassionate detachment. It is where you learn to put into action the wishes and hopes that you have envisioned, before you came into this life."
"Detachment is often thought to mean “do not get involved.” It actually means that you do not allow what your idea of 'how things should be' to dictate in any relationship. There is no need to hide from life. Give yourself to life and to the celebration of being Soul. Cooperate and celebrate together."
"Nothing on the earth plane remains in the same place or in the same state. Everything moves and changes; it either develops and grows, or it weakens and it degenerates. Growth and decay are the inevitable and natural cycle and condition of this plane. You cannot transcend or negate karmic law."
"There have been and will be disasters and upheavals, large and small; much growth and much decay. The Earth, and all that dwell upon it, move through natural cycles which have occurred in this way, from the beginning. One might wish it were different, however, for the foreseeable future, this is the way of the physical plane."
"Yes, it is disturbing to see the literal inhumanity with which humans treat one another. Yes, it is disturbing to sense the pain and imbalance emanating from the various areas of the earth. Sensitive Beings naturally wish to do something to 'fix the problem’ and 'heal’ the pain and disturbances. Nevertheless, the Earth does not need healing in the way that you humans understand the concept. It is the humans who need the healing. Heal yourselves and you will heal the world. Become more peaceful - and the world will become more peaceful."
"It is human nature to focus outside of oneself as a way of distracting from the true (and much harder) inner work. Those who concentrate on 'fixing' themselves will accomplish what might seem like 'miracles' in their lifetimes. Those who concentrate on “fixing” things outside of themselves will accomplish nothing, except for more lifetimes on this planet."
"Energy is energy, just as fire is fire and electricity is electricity. All can be used for good or ill - and they ARE used for both. Any energy sent into the earth is potent energy - and it can also be used for good or ill. Combining and generating energies within a group, even in a group that has stated “good intentions” may not have the desired or imagined effects, no matter the intent. Good intentions are not enough to soften or moderate the energy and its effect on the earth."
"Accordingly, I suggest that you consider doing something more far-sighted and safer than sending energy into the earth. I suggest that you still generate energy, and perhaps even combine your energy with others, but do this with only the intention of you, yourself, becoming internally more peaceful, loving and compassionate. This will effect profound changes in oneself as well as in the members of any group participating. Re-form yourself and you will re-form the thousands that you interact with. Spend some small effort in understanding this thoroughly and then a good result can be depended upon."
Here is a meditation that you can use to this effect with Crystal Skulls:
Begin by holding a crystal skull or sitting with a gathering of them. While breathing slowly, focus on bringing love (as you understand it) into the heart area. This love is perceived as a Golden ball of Light.
Allow the Golden Light to expand slowly as you breathe in, filling yourself and the skull(s). Allow the Golden Light to slowly expand, filling the room, then the building, the city, the country, that part of the world…and finally, allow it to surround the entire earth, bathing everything on it with the highest vibrations of love and compassion.
"There is no need to concern yourself where the resultant energy is going or what it is doing. There is no need to try and control any resultant energies. Give freely. Let it go out, to be used in whatever manner is appropriate by the Earth and its inhabitants. Sending this ‘Higher Love Energy,’ without an individual or group specifically directing its final usage, will ensure that it is in a non detrimental form. Your skulls will also absorb this spiritual energy and release it where and when it is needed, without your direction."
"The quality of the ‘Love Energy’ that is sent by each individual will depend in part on what the sender has experienced, and can remember of Love. If they have experienced deep and unconditional Love, they will be able to picture that Love and send it. If they have experienced only conditional love, they will send that. Whatever is sent will be more than adequate, as long as there is no intent to manipulate the energies in any manner beyond offering them to be used. The act of sending even conditional love will, over some time, expand and become the more unconditional love. Thus the more one practices, the more benefit will accrue to the Sender, and to all upon the Earth."
"Please do not use your skulls and crystals to focus and send any energy into the earth, even this ‘Love Energy.’ Simply allow the energy to gently enfold the skulls and they will take only what they can use. Using a skull or other crystal to send and focus intense amounts of energy may damage their inner energy matrix and render them useless thereafter. Heed the example of Atlantis."
"Finally, when you consider the coming changes, remember that there does not need to be a general, large scale "disaster" to immobilize many human beings. The everyday, small misfortunes of life are enough to throw most humans out of balance. When one is seriously out of balance they are not able to be of service to themselves or others. We each have different strengths and weaknesses. What is a severe test for one, may be quite easy for another.
"Consequently, it behooves each of us to have patience and compassion with one another, for each of us will inevitably come to a place that is challenging, where we must turn to one another for aid and support. For that reason, make every effort to live your lives with Balance and Gracefully, that is, with Grace.
Remember and Know, that there is always a way through troubled times. There is always a way."
We are all human and therefore, are all stuck somewhere. In fact, we could be stuck at several places, at the same time. If we want to benefit and learn from the hidden lessons of the Major Arcana, we have to be willing to look at our own position in the series honestly. There are clues and hints for us to study and ponder in the images of the cards. To get the full benefit, we have to face and then deal with our own biases and defense mechanisms. That is really difficult. Defense mechanisms are built to protect us from the brutal truth of our own failings; they don't work well anymore, when we become aware of them.
True change is always thorny; sometimes it's devastating. As I write this, much of the world is going through the shared experience of a number of very difficult alterations to the routine of their daily lives. This has taken place within a very short period of time, however, the energy that drives the materialization of intense change builds over a long period of time. As it begins to manifest, few pay attention at first; those who notice the signs and try to say something about it are ignored, ridiculed or even executed. Once the process begins, there is no stopping it.
This is The Tower energy at work.
In every generation there are always some people who believe that big changes are necessary. Some believe in total anarchy, although most are not willing to go to those extremes.
Some don't want to believe it's really happening at all, and will grab onto anything they can find that will support their denial, even as various aspects of society and their daily lives deteriorate around them. Some try their best to do everything they can to hold it together, so that their lives can go back to "normal" someday. Many, regardless of belief systems, look for anything or anyone that they can blame for the situation, often coming up with fantastical reasons that this is happening. Divisions arise and fanatics are born; they are found at both ends of the spectrum.
Some see this upheaval as the result of centuries of behaviors that we have brought upon ourselves. Whatever the cause, the fact is that these changes are inevitable and unrelenting; after this, there will be a new normal.
At this moment, a literal force of nature is altering our way of life and transforming global cultures in ways that were unthinkable, just a few months ago. At the same time, big Cultural shifts are taking place. Entire countries, as well as individuals, are being forced to change standards of behaviors, beliefs and viewpoints that have been internalized and taken for granted, for as long as anyone can remember.
Three Cards
Death, The Devil and The Tower: these are the three images from the Tarot that show up in the media, accompanied by the appropriate tense soundtrack, to titillate and disturb people. Death and The Devil are frightening to many, but at least they are somewhat known quantities; The Tower presents as something both mysterious and terrifying. The scene on the card shows a tall tower sitting high upon a mountaintop. It is night and the tower is being struck again and again by lightning. It begins to crumble, as two people fall to their death, having jumped to save themselves from burning or being crushed.
The Tower symbolizes change; sudden and irreversible change. That's terrifying to many, if not most, people. This image foretells destruction of some kind. It is no less than the annihilation of a closed system of patterns: habits, biases, belief systems, prejudices, relationships, fears and dogmas.
These are the things that we cling to emotionally and often irrationally; these are the things that imprison us and separate us from others.
Some Ancients called The Tower "The House of God." This Tower is not the house of the Creator - far from it. This Tower is the house of a "little g" god; it's a god we ourselves have created and sustained, feeding it our deepest fears, anxieties and inadequacies.
In many cases, we've inherited this puny god from our ancestors and accepted it because our culture, family and/or loved ones have said that this is what is correct. We do not question; heretics are severely punished.
No, The Tower is not the house of a powerful and compassionate Being. What lives up there doesn't want to be looked at; it's hiding up there, far from prying eyes. This is the house of a petty god that we believed in and feared, when we were younger or less aware. The Tower is our Tower; a home that we have fashioned of our own weaknesses. We are who lives at the top of this Tower.
There is usually someone up there with us; they may be a family member, friend, a lover, or an enemy. Sometimes we have an entire group of people living in The Tower with us. Then we can congratulate each other on how we are truly 'chosen' ones, living above the rest. We are secure in our knowledge that we that we know what our god wants for us - and for everyone else. We are far seeing, watching over the world from the top of our tower.
If our companions start questioning us or disagree with what we 'know' to be the truth, we might pity them, at first. We try to convince them that they are mistaken and need to repent. Eventually, though, we lose patience with the unbeliever; maybe we begin to fear that our god will think we are also sinners. In that case, there's not much left to be done; we throw the other person off The Tower and in this way, prove our faithfulness. We hold tight to our beliefs and our righteousness.
The Tower is not a house of God: it's a prison. Anyone in The Tower is stuck, trapped and afraid. Above all, they are afraid to even begin to think about such things. It's beyond terrifying to consider that you've lived a life of major self-delusion, although we all have done so, at one time or another.
There is no exit from that Tower; no sensible way out of it. We can only choose to jump, or wait for it to collapse upon us.
For eons we can't bring ourselves to jump. We are so very afraid... Of course we are. So we stay there, hoping and hiding, unable to accept or face anything less than our 'god' coming to save us. Hopefully, with a generous reward for our faith.
At some point, though, it's time. The Soul has learned everything it can learn from its time at the top of a Tower of illusions. Our Soul is not afraid: we could say it's been getting bored with this pattern and it's ready for the change. We may not be consciously aware of this, but perhaps something lurks in the back of our mind, making it difficult to concentrate. Although there are numerous warnings of the inevitably of the coming cataclysm... All are ignored.
The fateful night comes when we are awakened from our sleep as The Tower is battered by lightning, striking over and over. It begins to sway and break apart. Fire erupts, and starts consuming everything inside. As the flames get closer to our hiding place at the top, there are only two simple choices left: stay and die a horrible death by fire - or jump and end it quickly. It is finally a clear choice, with a clear ending; just not the one we had hoped for. So simple at the end.
We humans often prefer to wait for a disaster to force us to face what we have created.
As The Tower crumbles, and we tumble, so do our ego patterns and built up belief systems. They are consumed in the fire.
The Tower energy exists to destroy the things that we cling to with every fiber of our being; the patterns and behaviors that are harming us or holding us back, in a significant way. These are the things we will never easily and willingly let go of; we believe we cannot exist without them.
In the order of the Major Arcana of the Tarot, it's no mistake that The Tower comes right after cards that are named "The Devil" and "Temperance." At first they man seen unrelated, but they are part of an archetypal sequence of events and an opening of awareness - and temptation - that leads up to The Tower.
The Temperance card is a complex card and energy. It embodies purity, as well as alchemy and the magic and mystery of Life.
It shows a beautiful Angel in a pale blue robe, performing a miracle that is at first, unseen. The Angel pours the water sideways, in order to mix the contents together, and the liquid moves against the natural law of gravity.
The cards references balance in several ways: the Angel is both masculine and feminine; one foot is on the earth and one is in the water. It also takes perfect balance to hold the cups as they are. A golden triangle within a square is on the Angel's robe: a symbol in alchemy, that has a metaphorical meaning: attempting anything that seems impossible. The Square represents the Earth and the natural laws we are bound by when incarnated; it surrounds the triangle, which in this case, represents the human being.
The triangle can also represent the importance of maintaining a balance between Love, Power and Wisdom. It is also a symbol of the Holy Trinity. Above it on the angel's chest is the four letter Hebrew word for God: Tetragrammaton.
There is a path, going off into the distance, leading to a golden crown, filled with Light. Follow your path to find enlightenment.
Yellow irises symbolize passion wisdom, hope, trust, and valor. You need them all to follow your spiritual path.
Get out of balance too far one way or another, and this card can symbolize an obsession.
The word temperance means self-control and restraint, yet, there is another meaning. When we experience the energy of Temperance, as represented in the Major Arcana, we also experience the lessons we've created out of the extreme experiences we sought out in our search for hidden truths and the Magic that enlivens the Universe.
We are as strong as steel in our determination to solve the great mysteries, but the steel that we are at this point, cannot bend without breaking. Without any true understanding of what we've asked for, we beg our God, Guides and Angel's to help us to grow and evolve into what we are meant to be.
Their answer is "yes." And so it goes.
Our spiritual steel is thrust into a forge of spiritual fire.
We are beaten and folded and tempered in that fire, again and again, as the Master Bladesmith forges our spiritual energy into a strong, yet flexible, ethereal blade.
When finished, we hold a matchless edge that will withstand the stress of many battles: most of them with ourselves.
Our layover at Temperance is where we get our first glimpse of the awe inspiring beauty of our spiritual selves. Our Soul is truly "like unto God."
The problem starts when we forget that we are NOT God; we are still only human. We are still sampling a smorgasbord of experiences on the Wheel of Life. This is just another step in our evolution and as always, we can easily get stuck here.
Here is where we start to believe the delusion that the world needs us and our powerful insights in order to survive: we have an important 'Mission.' When this fantasy worms its way into our belief systems, we begin gathering followers to us, in the mistaken belief that we can prop up our illusions by surrounding ourselves with "true believers."
Now we set down our fine blade, only using it to inspire others to gasp in awe of the power we hold, or to cut people who anger us when they don't see things as we do.
Our beautiful blade becomes something repulsive.
When we finally leave this step of our journey, we see just what we did with our spiritual power and are disgusted. We are then inevitably sucked into the vortex of our next opportunity to learn: The Devil.
In The Devil card, we find darkness and two, possibly damned, people chained to the fearsome figure of The Devil.
Here, we will practice a self-designed regimen, where we live only to experience one self-indulgence after another.
We re-made our beautiful ethereal blade into the heavy chains of self-destruction that hold us trapped there, captive to our passions and vices. We spend our time doing empty things that ultimately leave us hating ourselves. There is no love at that level, only a ravenous lust that never satisfies.
We quickly forgot that the chains we wrapped around ourselves are loose, and always have been; we are so very afraid to take them off.
When we gain enough awareness to finally begin removing the chains and to embark on the contemplation of what we have wrought, we start to realize that we have behaviors and patterns that need serious adjustment. Now we are faced anew with fear and self-hatred, as we contemplate what we have created with our prior acts and actions.
We wallow in self-pity, and give ourselves more credit than we deserve, for good or ill. Our emotions teeter back and forth, often in complete opposition to one another. We look at how we behaved when we were immersed in our encounter with Temperance, going out of balance and losing compassion for others; moving into our ego and out of our heart. The result is our behavior while visiting with The Devil. We will take the self-pity and self-importance that we cling to with us, as we try to find some self-forgiveness or at least forget what we have done, up in our Tower.
Instead of seeing clearly from such a height, we will chain and imprison ourselves in a new way, with our despair, doubts and dogmas. Eventually, we enter a state of great fear and spend all of our time trying to keep our Tower from being destroyed, even as all the signs point to the fact that it's impossible to stop the destruction. We expend a lot energy in disguising our fears, so we don't have to hate ourselves.
Those that live in the Tower often hide behind anger instead of fear; anger is often easier to express than fear and less threatening to our defense mechanisms.
As I said, some will pretend none of this is real or that the cataclysm will never touch them.
After all... they live in The Tower, where their little g 'god' will arrive in time to save them.
Possibly, their god will even smite, destroy and teach a hard lesson to those who are not true and dedicated believers. That's what we Tower dwellers self-righteously wish to happen to any who don't believe the same things as we do.
The fear that is loose in the world is worse than it has been for generations and at this moment, many people's fears control them. The Tower will fall, and no one can stop it. It's not possible to predict exactly what will happen to any one person or group. It's only possible to predict that many things WILL change and that there is no going back. The Tower is falling.
While this process of falling continues, some people will communicate with others only as a means to spread their bitterness, feeling justified in letting out their formerly repressed anger. Some will cloak this fear in a victim mentality. They will blame anyone that's handy for their disappointment and anger. They are ones who will build a new Tower to hide in... and if they do, they will likely waste the rest of this life stuck there, again.
Some people will allow their fear to paralyze them to the point that they are unable to function in a changed world. Their energetic subtle body defenses may fail or shred. If their depletion of vital energy becomes too great, they will end up depressed and worn out. This can cause a suppressed immune system and possibly physical symptoms that have no known physical cause. That is what happens when this kind of fear is loose in the world.
Those ways of coping are not the only ways that a person can react to The Tower energies. Living in fear no longer serves a useful purpose. Some people will take this time of change as an opportunity for renewal and to grow emotionally and spiritually. There is an increasing awareness that we are all living on the same planet, dealing with the same issues; we can mitigate the changes by starting to work together. The way forward is to m beyond a divided and self-centered approach to life.
Yes, there is still a lot of hope in the world, even during the fall of our Towers.
The Tower is an extreme situation; the lightning destroys our self-made prison and blasts open what was repressed or painful. In doing this, The Tower liberates us with its revelations.
After The Tower, comes The Star. We can start again with the luminous star of Hope.
We can choose get our spiritual selves ready to build again. Even though this is a chaotic period, we have been given a gift: we can choose to become aware of our ingrained societal, cultural and personal patterns that do not serve us, or any of humanity. We can awaken now, before The Tower falls and resolve to make the necessary adjustments; afterwards, we will be ready to build again.
This is a difficult time, but after The Tower falls, we will have a chance to gather together the surviving bricks; we can rebuild and refocus. Perhaps the result will be something that is better for the planet and the humans and other Beings who we share it with.
The Tower represents a shocking time of change and destruction.
The Star represents what comes next: Hope, and the expectation of a marvelous achievement.
The Hope card shows a nude woman on one knee, pouring water from two vessels: one onto the fertile land and one into a pool of water.
A small bird is in a tree: an ibis, associated with the concepts of transition and trust. The woman is vulnerable, her purity shines in the light of the stars. Behind her eight stars shine in a clear sky. The largest star represents Venus, the planet as well as the goddess of Love. There are seven smaller stars surrounding it.
In Temperance, the angel miraculously pours water back and forth between the two cups, never losing a drop.
The Star pours out her waters, holding nothing back, as she kneels. She gives us a powerful image of healing. She is a human being, not an idealized Angel. She reminds us that we must work on healing and transforming ourselves, not wait for a miracle to come and save us.
In order to transform and renew, we must let go of old ways of thinking, feeling and acting: understanding that The Tower will fall, no matter how we wish otherwise. We must dig deep within and have the courage to take the first step: jump off and start again.
It's been said that Hope may be the most precious thing we have; even more precious than love. For if we love, but cannot hope, we truly live in a bleak world.
As The Tower energy shakes the world, remember that even while we are in the light, the dark exists but in order to see the stars, you must be in the darkness. The Star is the energy of Hope, renewal and optimism and it shines through the darkness.
Hearing loss is an invisible disability. There is also often a stigma associated with it. People don't want others to know they are having difficulty understanding or that they wear hearing aids, maybe fearing they look old. Or they don't want to admit they can't figure out what you just said, maybe fearing they are 'losing it' - or fearing that you think they are...
Approximately 17% of adults are affected by hearing loss to one degree or another. That's almost one in five people. Many of those millions are saying to themselves that they are doing fine, and they can wait to gets aids. Even mild loss can make it difficult to understand conversations in a noisy environment (like restaurants) AND there are other health issues associated with even mild hearing loss that most people don't know about.
Hearing loss can affect your balance and cause serious fall issues. There is also solid research showing that it has an impact on cognitive function - your brain is using a lot of its resources trying to understand sounds.
Wearing hearing aids can help you to communicate and they can also take a load off of the auditory centers of the brains. But aids are not like glasses. They cannot correct back to normal. Also, they work best within 3-6 feet. You have to give yourself time to get used to them and to let your brain adjust to more input.
Hearing loss can be isolating. It's easy to just give up trying to figure out a conversation and sit there and nod or smile - or fall asleep - without knowing what's being said. It's not easy to lose your hearing - and it's not always easy to live with someone who has However, there are coping strategies you and your loved ones can use to communicate better. You can actually become closer when you learn how to work together.
Simple Ways To Communicate Better With Anyone With Hearing Loss:
-First, gain their attention. Missing the beginning of the message can make understanding very difficult.
-Keep hands away from your face, avoid talking with food or gum in your mouth.
-Face the person directly and, if possible at same eye level. Give the listener every chance to see your whole face.
-Good lighting is important, but make sure that light is not shining in the listener’s eyes.
-Speak clearly, but don’t shout.
-Reduce background noise: turn off the radio or television and or move to a quieter place.
-If you’re not making yourself understood, don't just repeat the same thing! Use different words and find a different way of saying the same thing.
-Avoid trying to have conversations from another room!
-Be patient. Persons with hearing loss need some patience and understanding with themselves - and from their family and friends. .
And finally - a good attitude can make all the difference.
Looking at what you can't do anymore is depressing. It's also a fact of life that everyone will have to deal with at some point. We age, we get injured...circumstances in life change. Maybe things we loved doing are not possible anymore, whether it's hearing a concert or climbing a mountain. But we can do something - usually many some things. Focusing on what I can still do is one of my best and favorite coping strategies. I have several disabilities and I could - and can - easily sit and think about the many things I can't do anymore.There are lots of things I want to do that I can't do anymore -and there are times it gets to me. I allow my feelings when they come up, but I refuse to stay in them. I know that it helps me to re-focus and to be grateful for what I CAN do. I get up and go do one of the many things that I am still able to do. Even if that is just leaving the house and going out into the desert to meditate and pray.
This is practical spirituality.
In that vein, here is the article I wrote about gratitude and my hearing loss.
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"I can still hear a lot...but I don't understand what you just said!"
Family gatherings and other social events can be challenging for those of us with hearing loss. It's easy for me to get overwhelmed with the clamor - and it's easy to put my focus on how difficult it can be to hear and understand what's going on around me. It often seems that there is just a constant and tiring effort required to communicate with others. It's all too easy for me to slip into negative ways of thinking. When you're hard of hearing, sometimes you can get stuck on the depressing aspects of it.
For example:
I get tired of having to repeat the same things over and over. Like everyone else with hearing loss, I find myself saying: "Please face me when you speak." "Please face me!" Please LOOK at me!"
Or "You don't need to raise your voice or yell at me when you're talking to me, just slow it down a bit!"
And let's not forget "Please don't talk to me when you are walking away from me, or yell at me from another room!"
I don't always follow the dinner conversation at home, in groups, or in restaurants. If the television is on and someone is trying to talk to me, I usually have difficulty understanding them. Any kind of background noise can make it hard to figure out what people are saying.
I have to use closed captions on the TV in order to understand what is going on. Those captions can be wildly inaccurate or weird! They also cover up things that my husband is trying to see on the screen.
I have to be extra careful brushing my hair because the brush can easily hang up on one of my very expensive hearing aids - and make it go flying across the room or into the trashcan - or even the toilet!!
Et cetera, et cetera...
But these are really small annoyances. I need, and want, to re-focus - to remember the fact that, overall, my hearing aids have helped me to connect better with other people and with all of the life that goes on around me. Whatever inconveniences they may cause, my hearing aids have been worth every penny - and every irritation - because they have improved my quality of life. I communicate better with my friends and family, at work and in my everyday life.
At our weekly peer support group at the Adult Loss Of Hearing Association (ALOHA) we often discuss the fact that many of us do still hear a lot of sounds - but we don't always understand what we are hearing. Understanding human speech is the biggest challenge of all, for most of us.
Until I started going to the support groups at ALOHA I hadn't realized that there were other things that could help me to understand better. I have properly programmed hearing aids, but I've learned other strategies and found some tools that can be very helpful.
Maybe the most useful for me, personally, has been Speechreading. The eight week class I took made a HUGE difference to me. It used to be called "Lip Reading" but "Speechreading" is a more accurate term, as reading speech includes more than the lips. Only about 20-30% of speech is visible on the lips, so you learn to pay close attention to the context of the conversation and watch the shape of the lips, as well as facial expressions and other body language. I learned where to sit in rooms and restaurants so it's easier to watch people's faces when they talk and where there is less noise behind me. I use Speechreading extensively, daily, and it adds a lot to my overall comprehension. Yes, I still miss out on some things that are going on but I get a lot more than I used to.
There are also various kinds of amplification and/or assistive listening devices available to me, such as caption phones, inductive listening loops (which are used with the telecoils in hearing aids), Pocket Talkers and other personal devices that connect to microphones and other things through our hearing aids. They help me to hear and comprehend better in a variety of situations.
Thanks to some of these devices, I can go to a movie again and enjoy the film, just like anyone else. I check out a personal neckloop at the main ticket counter and it connects directly to the telecoils in my aids. This setup brings the sound directly into my ears, to be processed by my aids. I also use a captioning device in the theater that sits in the drink holder. If I miss a word through the neckloop, I can read it on the device. It's great! There is more technology developed every year and I try to educate myself on it so I can figure out what might be useful.
Instead of putting my focus on what I can't hear or don't understand in the coming year, I am reminding myself to be grateful for what sounds I DO hear, no matter how much - or how little - that may be.
I am reminding myself that I may need to repeat myself and to speak up when I need someone to look at me. I'm going to try to be a little more patient and not take it personally when a loved one forgets that I can't understand them like I used to.
A person who experiences hearing loss goes on a very personal journey. The journey is unique to them, but the emotions are not. Many others have felt similar feelings of withdrawal, isolation, depression, frustration and even anger or fear. Not being able to hear and understand what is going on around me can be overwhelming. At times, I feel alone. That reminds me of how thankful I am for my friends at the weekly ALOHA peer support group. I've found others who are on a similar journey and who understand the challenges I face. These generous souls have made my own journey with hearing loss less lonely - and easier to deal with - on so many levels.
Many of us cannot hear the gentle fall of rain anymore - or even the crash of thunder. We may miss out on all or most of a symphony orchestra, or the voice of a small child singing or telling us about their day. We may not be able to enjoy a poetry reading or a sports announcer anymore. However, we can focus on educating ourselves about what's available to us so that we can try out what might be useful to us. We can learn simple coping strategies and find out what new technological options are available. There are things we can do to help ourselves to make the most of what we are still able to hear. For instance, I can move to a quieter place amidst the pandemonium - and then with the help of my hearing aids (and maybe other assistive listening devices) I can have a conversation with just about anyone - as long as they look at me!
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I call what Synergy and I do 'sessions.' I do not call them 'readings.' I have done readings since I was a child. I'm fast and I'm accurate, but this is not what I want to do at this time of my life. So, I only do a reading if Synergy directs me to do so or if a person's Guide asks me to do so. I know what people think a reading is going to be like and I don't want people to have expectations of what I do with Synergy as a typical reading from a psychic.
I don't want them to think it will be like what they have experienced with another ancient or - even a very active contemporary crystal skull. What I do is different.
In fact, each crystal skull and each guardian is different. They all have their own ways of working with people and all are valid and useful in their own way!
What I do can be very intense. I use a variety of shamanistic and energy techniques that serve to facilitate, as well as intensify the experience. Many times a session will include past life experiences. Synergy goes directly a life if it involves something that pertains to what is happening at this time in your life. The end result is to give you information so that you can understand things that never made sense before.
The energy, the insights... everything that happens assists in raising your spiritual vibration - just a little bit - and as a result, to help you to remember a bit more about who you really are, as a spiritual Being.
That is where much of my passion for this work comes from. I love to support people as they find their way to healing and freeing themselves, little by little, from the tangles us humans all seem to create when we come to this earth and forget who we really are. We can call them karmic ties or ancestral energies... or a number of other things. Doesn't matter. What matters it the results.
Life doesn't have to be perfect to be very good.
Wow! That's a shocking thing to say!
We all have past traumas and deep disappointments. We all have belief systems that keep us stuck, loss, sadness, a desire to know our purpose... Go back far enough and you will see that we have all lost our 'people' at one time or another. We can focus on what we have lost or we can begin to refocus, and learn to move forward. It's easy to feel lost and lonely. Especially if we are different that the Cultural norm.
We humans have so much more in common than we ever have that is different. We can choose to focus on that.
We can do so much more together than we can alone. That IS synergy, the energy. Cooperation at a high level.
Things do not have to be perfect in your life - or mine - to be good. In fact, I haven't seen anything that is perfect...maybe a flower at a certain moment...
We all want to know love and joy and laughter. We all want to heal. We can have this. It may not be easy. It may not happen immediately or even be possible for you, all of the time. But that's OK. That's human.
Life can be pretty darn good overall, even if there are times when it's not everything you want. We can learn to accept that who we are is good enough and that we don't have to make huge changes to become a happier person - small steps that you take consistently will lead to where you want to go - and it won't throw you out of balance or make you feel inadequate if you don't meet goals that were set too high to begin with.
I love that my work with Synergy is a part of this healing.
Synergy has runes on the bottom of it, carved long ago. They are an archaic form of the Ogham or Oham language. They promise to raise ones vibration through love, joy, laughter, fellowship and honesty - but there is a sacrifice to be made. For most people that sacrifice is a small, yet very important, part of their journey. This sacrifice involves leaving any emotions of fear, guilt, feelings of unworthiness, etc. behind, in order to accept the gifts that are offered.
Not everyone is ready to do that to the same degree. I have some confidence, based on past experiences, that the people who come to Synergy are ready to begin this and being a part of their process is always beautiful.
Love, Joy, Laughter... These things raise our spiritual vibrations. I seek the things that bring those energies into my life.
Cherubs are closely identified with Valentine's Day. These cute little guys are depicted as innocent children with wings. They don't...but that's another story! Cherubs aren't the only kind of Angels. There are many different kinds! The Angels I prefer to focus on are our 'Guardian Angels' what I would call our "Companions Along the Way."
We could debate for quite a while about Angels and what they look like, what their jobs are, etc. But I'd like to focus in this post on one of their most important functions.
Long ago, Saint Augustine, an acknowledged expert on the subject, said, "Angels are spirits, but it is not because they are spirits that they are Angels. They become Angels when they are sent. For the name Angel refers to their office, not their nature. You ask the name of this nature, it is spirit; you ask its office, it is that of an Angel, which is a messenger."
Each of us has at least one Angel with us, every day of our lives, and they have a message for each of us.
We may be very sincere in our declarations of love for others, but few humans experience the giving or receiving of true, unconditional love - and might not recognize it if they had!
Few people are loved in the manner that they feel that they deserve to be loved. Men and women tend to have expectations, of themselves and of others, that are not always readily met. These expectations mean that we are not able to completely accept another being; and they are not able to completely accept us.
Angels are messengers from God. The most important message they can bring to us is one of TOTAL love and acceptance. Angels see you for who you really are.
The type of Angels that are associated with a person are a direct reflection of the person's spiritual life intention, and can also be a response to the person's request for assistance of some sort. Angels know our "true selves"; they love you and help you, without prejudice. This doesn't necessarily mean that a person is living up to their highest intentions or potential. Few of us do! But, we tend to judge ourselves harshly. Angels do not judge.
Angels are throughout our history. They are mentioned frequently in the Bible, where they play an important part in relaying messages from God, directly to mankind. They communicate differently with each person, based upon that persons' ability to receive. Different methods are used, depending on a persons' expectations and biases. To put it simply, the Angels use whatever combination of methods that work with your particular tendencies. Once you perceive the total love pouring out from these Beings to you, your life changes. How would your life change if you you were to begin to experience - and to practice - grace and compassion for yourself and all other living things, seen and unseen.
I believe in Angels. In the past couple of decades it has become fashionable to believe in them. There is comfort in the thought of something watching over us, in our hectic lives, but, I think it is a mistake to make a fad out of them or to trivialize them. The Angels of the Bible were not cute and cuddly or static and inflexible. They were dynamic Beings, intensely interested in our human activities. They played an active part in the lives of the humans who recognized them.
I do believe that we are watched over, but I also believe that one of the main purposes of our Guardian Angels is to remind us of the unconditional love that the Creator has for each of us, and to help us to express that love in our own lives, as well as in the lives of others.
Angels are messengers. I believe the most important message they bring to humanity is one of total love and acceptance.
I would like to share something that happened to me awhile back. It was an interesting lesson. I thought that I understood this particular 'truth', but I obviously needed a refresher course. You see, whenever I think that I've learned something - that I've understand a particular lesson, I will soon get the chance to see that I didn't get it after all. Ha ha!
This process can be quite interesting, even amusing, if I am willing to pay attention - and try not to judge myself. (Which involves almost tearing my hair out and screaming "How stupid can I be?”)
If I am willing to quit fighting myself and accept the situation as it is happening, then I can get some detachment. If I do this, then it's more like I'm taking an exam in some subject. The circumstances can be uncomfortable, but if I just calm down and think back over what I have studied and use what I have learned, it is soon over. I usually do alright when I settle down.
Here's what happened:
A few years ago there was a woman that I'd had a hard time working with. She could be abrasive and quite angry, at times. I was sure she had some kind of a problem with me, since it seemed like every time that I had to work with her she couldn't resist being condescending. She seemed to enjoy picking at me and had said things that were downright rude, even in front of people. Although I tried to stand up to her, I was kind of afraid of her. She was very aggressive at times and I found her unpleasant.
I began to dread having to deal with her. Once, after she got really mean with me I started to lose my temper and I got very intense with her and asked her to back off. This resulted in her being a bit more careful with her remarks around me for awhile, but it was not a satisfactory solution, since now we were both anxious and defensive when we were together.
The situation was deteriorating and I couldn't seem to stop it. I thought if we could just communicate we could move through this. I said I had something I wanted to talk to her about and she said she did too. Before I could say anything she said that she wanted a chance to tell me that she thought I needed a new last name because 'Whitfield' wasn't that easy for her to say and it was too long.
What???
At that point, I realized that not only was this not getting anywhere, but now for sure I was part of the problem because I felt like smacking her! I just couldn't seem to get a handle on things. I tried contemplating and praying about it, but had not received an answer - at least not one that I could understand. She confused me, pissed me off and she intimidated me. I did my best to avoid her.
Things went along about the same for a few months, but as these things do... it all came to a head one day. We were both working for a local newspaper and a deadline was looming. Several people were out sick and it was up to her and I to get all of the ads for the paper 'camera ready' for the printer. We were going to be engaged in some very exacting computer work. She didn't exactly know what she was doing and I was supposed to teach her when she needed help.
When she came into the area I was working in and the air actually seemed to darken. I felt stifled. I could not imagine spending hours with her in a small space and trying to interact with her. Not when I felt the way that I did about her. She scared the heck out of me! I felt a tremendous panic starting. I tried to breath through it, but it grew as I sat there unable to get away from her.
After a short time, I excused myself and went to the restroom. I stood looking out the window at the parking lot, intensely wishing I were somewhere else. I felt nauseated by the idea of having to interact with her... of literally having to sit within 3 feet of her for many, many more hours. How could I possibly concentrate or even function?
I thought about pretending to get sick, of going out to get lunch... I wanted to run away really badly. I knew that I couldn't. If I left it would accomplish nothing and I'd be letting the owner down. We would not meet the deadline.
I could try to just ignore her. But how would I be able to teach her what to do if I refused to speak to her?
I thought about going out there and saying "Look, let's just be honest. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just try to make the best of it anyway."
Thinking over that approach, it didn't seem that would bring about what I had in mind, which was an end to the hostilities, not an escalation of them!
I made an effort to mentally list her strong points. If I could just find one thing about her to focus on -- just one thing that I admired or at least respected...
It didn't work. My mind stayed blank. I tried to pray again, but by now, nothing at all was happening. I was desperate.
Feeling physically ill and thinking that I really should be able to handle this, I turned to my Guide, who I call 'Joe.' He's been with me all my life and I have a close relationship with him. I see him as clearly as I see other people and can hear him as well - or better - being hard of hearing - than other people. :-D (See previous blog entries about Joe.)
"Joe!" I wailed, "What am I going to do?"
His calm, clear voice said, as it had thousands of times before,"Clear yourself, quiet yourself".
I knew he was right. If I was going to get through the deadlines and the next several hours with this woman, I had to do something to get a hold of myself and my emotions. I always say that you teach what you need to learn... so it was time to "walk my talk."
I went into an empty stall in the bathroom. I did a short meditative protection and energy clearing exercise. Then I did something physical. I spent several minutes quietly saying to myself, "I clear my mind, I clear my soul", as I rather vigorously rubbed the sides of back, and along my arms with the intent to get my energy moving and let go of my feelings towards this woman.
Finally, I quieted down.
My energy and emotions were clear for a moment; my mind was still. Into this stillness, I asked God if I might, please, "see this woman's Light today". I sincerely asked to be able to see her as another Soul, struggling through the lessons of this world- not just as someone who was personally irritating.
As I walked back to the office, I was unsure if anything would be different, but at least I felt better physically and emotionally. As I sat down at my chair, I noticed that I was at least okay with sitting near her. My feelings were manageable. I was fully prepared to go out every few minutes to clear and quiet myself again, if I had to. Knowing this, I felt less pressure.
When I changed my feelings, I changed my reality. I marveled to myself, "Wow, this stuff really does work!" I felt like laughing in relief and joy.
After awhile, she tried to talk with me, which was usually an invitation to criticism from her, but this time, instead of getting defensive, I stopped what I was doing and I looked at her. I listened and I asked her how she was.
When I first asked her, I have to admit that I didn't really care; I was just being polite. But all at once I felt an opening inside of me and I suddenly meant it. She must have felt my new sincerity, for to my surprise, she began to tell me how she'd been feeling.
As she spoke haltingly, of her life, of how unhappy she was with herself and of how much pain she was in, she slowly began to be approachable. I felt compassion for her, instead of irritation. I was pretty amazed.
As we worked she talked and by the time we were finished, I knew a great many details about her life. I had even shared a few things about myself with her. I'd known she wanted a strong relationship with her guardian angel, but until that day she had not even tried to communicate with her. We talked about that, too and I gave her some of my thoughts about how she might go about it.
In this way she was no different than I; she was ignoring her Guide, just like I've ignored Joe at times!
"Well," I thought, "you do teach what you need to learn more about!"
Her style of communicating, in general, was much different than mine. She was more intense and "pointy," but I know that I've had the same feelings that she was talking about when she shared with me. I had no right to judge her. Underneath her pain and abrasive attitude, she was a decent person, doing the best that she could do. That day, I had indeed seen her Light - seen past her wall and into her being.
At the end of that long day, I was was able to truthfully tell her that I could see her great beauty. She didn't have any snappy retorts to that. Instead, her face softened and I thought that she was going to cry. She thanked me profusely for being so kind, understanding and listening to her.
That made me smile. She had no idea.
Even though she was mystified as to what I meant, I had to thank her. Seeing her inner Light and humanness revealed to me was a gift!
What a great reminder. It's easy to put people who annoy or intimidate us into the little boxes and keep them there. We are lost in our own emotions and we judge them, before we ever get to really know them. Maybe it turns out that they aren't people we have much in common with, and maybe we aren't at all compatible, for many reasons... but how will we know if that's even true if we stay in a defensive place of self pity and panic like I did? I had gotten all tangled up on my own stuff ever time I was around her.
I was reminded once again that it's better to calm down, detach and be civil. Stop the silly dance and refocus myself. I felt a lot better when I stepped out of my own box that I'd built up for myself.
I try to be a realist. I knew this woman would still annoy me at times. She had a way of expressing herself that grated on most of the people around her. But after connecting with her that day, I was always able to see her as she was at her heart, and not just the caricature of her that I had defensively drawn in my mind.
What a great lesson!
And, if I forget the lesson, again... Well, I know for sure that there will always be another chance to remember coming my way! ;->
I want to start to share some things that I think might be of interest when I travel.
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This video was done for the Crystalline Fellowship - a new online group that is in the process of developing course, discussions and information about crystal skulls, earth energies, unseen Beings and general spirituality. This one is about Sherry's background and what brought her to this point in her life.
www.crystallinefellowship.com
Stop The Karmic Dance!
How can working with your past lives and bringing them into conscious memory help you in your present life?
After all, when it’s over, it’s over... right?
Wrong!
Each person is not only influenced by their past lives, but in many cases, they are still living out the same emotions and variations on scenarios, with the same souls, again and again.
We create patterns and we play them out over and over again. We are born repeatedly with the same group of Souls, and we are each meant to assist each other in gaining awareness and in working out our Karma.
The interplay between Souls who incarnate together over many lifetimes is fascinating. The outer relationships between people change, but the emotions and the issues that we feel compelled to play out on subconscious levels, stay the same.
Perhaps the most important purpose for doing work that brings you some awareness of your past lives and relationships is to stop the "Karmic dance" that we do with each other, as if we were on automatic pilot. You can wake up! You can learn to face your issues squarely and stop blaming someone or something else. You can also use this information to begin to experience a feeling of an acceptance of yourself and others.
To study your past lives from a spiritual perspective is to begin to understand your motivations in this life, and to let go of feelings of helplessness and victimization. That means that you start to see that everything that has happened or will happen to you has at least some basis in your own actions.
That thought scares some people and bewilders others. Things do not seem fair in life and horrendous seemingly random things happen everyday. It makes most of us wonder what is going on in the world. It's very distressing to watch the news and see the tremendous cruelty and senselessness that goes on in our universe. Man's ongoing in humanity to man is devastating to see.
I don't pretend to understand the full mechanisms of Karma or how things work on the grand cosmic scale. It's well beyond me. Even though we cannot change the world, or make much sense of it at times, I do think we can make progress towards becoming more aware and living more consciously, on a personal level.
I could be wrong, but I think that Karma is not about punishment. It is more about a kind of balancing of energies. The problem with the system is that these things take place over a such long period of time - and we have little or no memory of what has happened. How can we understand anything beyond the surface of things, if we can't remember what has come before?
Here is a quick example of what I am talking about:
Let's say that you have never been comfortable with "Uncle Billy" in this life. In a regression, or perhaps a very vivid dream, you find out that in a past life you were molested by "him." You have the strong realization that this has had a subconscious effect on your feelings towards him, even though he hasn't done anything that you know of, in this life. This may be very helpful information, as far as it goes. But this is not enough to help you to stop your 'Karmic dance' with Uncle Billy. It is only a beginning.
Why? Because, remembering this lifetime where he did something really bad to you isn't the whole story and it isn't so that you can justify your bad feelings towards him. If you go back farther you will find that you did something equally repulsive to him. Going back even further, he did something to you again, or maybe to your spouse, etc. etc. This continues, over and over.
This doesn't justify his behavior in that life or any other. Let me be very clear about that.
Learning about past lives doesn't justify bad behavior in this life on either side.
I'm bringing this up to take a look at how a relationship can evolve and then twist us up over a long period of time with only subconscious memories coming to the surface and no understanding of why there is strong fear or rage or - on the flip side love and attraction - felt towards another person.
The truth is that the beginnings of the difficulties between you and Uncle Billy will probably be so ancient that they never will be discovered.
At this time in history, I think that who started the situation in what lifetime does not matter anymore. The only thing that matters is putting an end to it so you can be free.
After a few lives of "He did this to me, so I got him back good." and "He killed my family so I vowed revenge" etc., you start to see a pattern emerge.
If you have some awareness and the willingness to accept your possible roles in the continuing dramas, then you can take steps to end the constant back and forth destruction. Set aside what happened and move forward. You cannot change the past but you can learn from it. I'm not saying forgive and forget. That's not up to me. Some people have a very difficult time with that and each person has to do what is right for themselves. Do the best you can and move forward.
If you are honest and diligent with your mediation and other studies, you will see the patterns of your multiple lives. You will see that you, and only you, are truly able to free yourself from old patterns and begin to take responsibility for what happens to you now and how you feel about your life and those around you.
You may even start to learn about balance and moderation! The so-called 'middle path' of total self-responsibility. It is a razor’s edge; a very thin line, that you easily fall off of. But that’s okay! The main way in which we learn about the middle path of balance is by falling off of the path, and going out of balance over and over. But then we return to it, again and again. Each situation becomes an opportunity to find out what you are really comfortable with and what your own personal middle path is really like.
Take a close look at your issues and own them. Quit pointing the finger at the other guy and look at your own feelings and actions. The spiritual and emotional freedom you will experience, when you no longer carry the age-old burdens of hatred, fear, jealousy, self-righteousness, etc., is worth whatever it takes to get there?
And besides, what else do you have to do with your time and your life? Continue your old dances? It’s your choice. Developing compassionate detachment and acceptance - for yourself and others - is a must on the path to self-realization. Gaining some perspective can help you to develop this detachment and acceptance and eventually, to stop your own Karmic dance.
The result is the empowerment of the individual. You can free up your energies to do other things when you are able to set your past to rest for real. Instead of merely "deflating the balloons" of intense emotions that you have carried around, you can begin to let them go. This kind of growth is a process; it is not a single event. It takes time and effort.
I think it's worth it.
There are a few reliable possibilities to help you to access these memories and perceptions. For example:
You could do past life regression work (there are associations that can refer you to a competent regression therapist near you.)
You could learn how to remember your dreams, use a dream journal and begin to remember your past lives and gain insights.
You might have a session with someone reputable who does what I do in my work with Synergy, where we access the Akashic records of one or two of your past lives that are directly involved with what is going on this life. That is a major part of what my work is about and I have done over 17,000 of these sessions to date with people wanting to heal themselves. It is endlessly gratifying to see people begin to find spiritual freedom.
Meditation and contemplation can bring glimpses of your past lives into your conscious mind and this may help you to begin to make connections.
Other techniques might be available that I am not aware of! Research the subject and see what feels right to you.
Use the information received in past life exploration, along with whatever other methods of self-discovery you are comfortable with, such as therapy, spiritual exercises, meditation, support groups, etc., to help you begin to integrate your new awareness into your daily life and take back your own power.
It's a wonderful feeling to let anger, fears and guilt go and leave it behind you. Many people do not believe that is possible – but it is. It does take time and work, but it is absolutely possible. When you are willing to try, one of the greatest rewards is the discovery itself. This kind of work can help you to understand your life's spiritual purposes and bring about the end of your own Karmic dances.
The route to spiritual freedom and self-awareness can be painful, confusing and complex at times, but it's also exhilarating to start to break free of the patterns that keeps you stuck.
I'll repeat myself and say that I think it's worth whatever it takes to get there.
After all, just think about it... what better things do you have to do?
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My mother wasn't upset or alarmed by this, she just told me that I was remembering back to when I was with Jesus in Heaven. This didn't quite sound right to either of us, but she really had no idea what I was babbling about.
When I was a little older, I called him "Shamran", or Sham for short. He always told me that names weren't important and that I could call him anything. "A rose by any other name is still a rose..."
As a child, I loved to look at his shining light. He was my special, mostly secret, lovely friend. He was very tall and he almost always wore a turban and a white robe when I was young. He was playful with me. Sometimes I would ask him to grow antenna like a Martian and turn green. I liked the effect!
Of course, he doesn't look like this, he is really a Being of Light that uses another form so that I can look at him easier.
As I grew older, I became uncomfortable with how he looked with his robe and turban. I didn't know anyone else who wore clothes like that. So when I was a teenager, I asked him to change into something a little less obvious. I didn't like his name anymore, and I guess it was like when kids get to a certain age and are embarrassed by everything their parents do.
Anyhow, in his love for me, he changed himself for me. His robe became a pair of electric blue overalls, and he wore a battered old cap. Ever since he has been "Joe" to me. This comes from a time and place when his name was Esteban Giuseppe Petronelli - Joe for short and I was his younger brother.
Joe is a simple name, that I felt comfortable with. It wasn't part of my reality or true understanding that so very, very few other people could also see him. That just didn't enter my mind at the time. I was just concerned with myself.
Why is it so difficult for to accept others for who they are? Too often, we need to change them into something "more acceptable..." Out of his love for me, Joe "re-invented" himself for me. Yes, it comes down to acceptance. I could accept him as a plain "Joe" easier than I could the incredible Being that he is.
I had a profound mystical experience after having a heart attack over twenty plus years ago. As a result, I took a new look at my old friend, in all of his light and glory. After all of those years, I realized how little I had really accepted Joe. I'd expected and needed him to love me, unconditionally. In return, I demanded that he conform or I wouldn't let him stay with me. I wept as I realized how selfish I was and how unkindly I had behaved. I'd stuck him "into a little box," for my own comfort. I wouldn't allow him to be himself.
Most of us do this to some degree or another, with just about everyone we meet. It is hard not to put our needs and expectations first when we deal with others. But we miss out on the richness of life, and the diversity of personalities if we do this. After my experience with Joe, I vowed that I would redouble my efforts to honor and respect others' needs and accept and allow them to be whoever they really are, at the moment.
A few years ago, I discovered that at several spiritual paths in the world recognize Joe as a Master teacher, under his lifetime with the name of Shams-I-Tabriz. That really surprised me and even upset me. I had not expected or wanted Joe to be a "Master." It goes back to my lack of acceptance of him and most of all, of myself.
I know it probably sounds silly, but that is how I felt. When I found out that others knew of him and respected him I was shocked and upset. It took several days to begin to deal with the idea. I realized that I didn't want a "guardian angel" who was thought of as a spiritual Master and teacher... I had to admit to, and confront my fears of, expectations - expectations that I thought would now be on me. And then I had to take a look at the fact that I didn't want to try and live up to these nebulous expectations.
Getting to know a little more about Joe didn't change him at all. But it did change me. At least for awhile. Luckily, I worked through these silly fears fairly quickly and got to the point where I could laugh at myself. For me, laughing has always been one of my ways through my own fears. I guess it is not really a surprise that I am the guardian of the ancient crystal skull (Synergy) that many have also called 'the laughing skull.'
Looking back I think that I also had the feeling that he was "my Joe" and that I had lost something by other people knowing of him. This is childish and selfish, and of course is not true. Obviously, one can have many friends. Jealousy never does any relationship good. I always tell my kids that you can't run out of love like you run out of milk...
I grew up and realized that not many people have such a close and open relationship with their Guides. I think I must have needed it to get through this life, or it wouldn't have happened. I am in my sixties now and I still do not know who I would be if not for him. Through thick and thin, Joe has been the architect and guardian of my heart and Soul. At the end of this life it will be Joe that waits for me, eager to bring me Home to our Creator.
Psychic gifts are interesting, useful and enticing... but, in and of themselves, they will never lead you to Self-Realization and a greater capacity to love. They have their place in your growth, and can be a big step towards your awakening. But the highest spiritual realms are far beyond the psychic realms.
We all know people with no scruples who are very psychic.
Psychic abilities do not equal someone being on any Spiritual path. It's a choice they must make, about how to use their abilities in their life and their work.
The psychic realms can become a trap! You may have heard this statement at one time or another. I don't mean it to scare anyone. What I mean is that one can become so fascinated with psychic phenomena that they forget the reason it exists in the first place.
Psychic phenomena is not good or bad in and of itself. It's what we do with what we learn and experience.
When we have an experience for ourselves, it becomes evidence of the existence of other realms and Beings, besides just those we are familiar with. It can remind us that there is more to this life beyond just what we can touch.
All psychic experiences are attached energetically to the physical plane in one way or another. That's because our physical bodies are attached to the physical planes. This includes the physical body and the subtle bodies such as, the emotional or astral, causal, mental and etheric. We only have psychic experiences when we are in a physical body. After we shed that body we have direct spiritual experiences.
When we focus on spiritual awareness it brings us higher than any of the physical planes - we begin to raise our vibrations out of the physical plane and into the Higher Realms, also sometimes called the God planes. They are unknowable and unexplainable until you experience them for yourself. Then you will never forget.
Psychic experiences can also be a way to help us to drop our attachment to the purely physical world. It is wonderful to realize that we are not the "meat machines" of our bodies; we are Soul, living in a physical vehicle for the time being. Having a mystical experience can act as a catalyst for your growth and opening. This is great and very appropriate use of the psychic realm.
However, sometimes the experiences become so interesting that we end up focusing on the phenomena rather than the results.
When you try to force or prolong your contact with these realms, it may defeat the purpose of the experience. Trying to hang onto any spiritual or mystical experience will make you susceptible to the trickery and deceit of the occult worlds.
It is far easier for many to initiate contact with a psychic influence than it is to stop it once it becomes frightening or something that you no longer want. Just ask someone who has messed around with black magic and had it backfire...
Once again, I am not saying that all psychic things are dangerous or bad. That would be like throwing the baby out with the bath water! For instance, it can be quite useful and a moving experience do go through a Past Life Regressions or a beautiful meditation. There is something very precious about a spiritual exercises designed to help you to become aware of the presence of and the love that your Guide has for you.
And things such as Crystal Skulls can be amazing Tools of Spiritual Awareness and not simply a 'power object!'
Of course, there are many more examples. My point is, that when you place your focus on spiritual development, rather than strictly psychic development, the "fruits of the spirit" come with your growth, in a natural, unforced manner. You have a smaller chance of getting wildly out of balance with your opening. The mystical or "psychic" things that happen to you when your purpose is one of spiritual development, will happen in order to help you to open and unfold.
And sometimes they may happen to shock you out of a rut!
Think about the ancient idea of the "thousand petal lotus." At first, your level of awareness is on the outermost layer of petals on the lotus; the innermost ideas or petals, are covered or hidden from you. As you gain in your understanding, these "petals" of your mind and experiences, open and you can see the truth of the underlying ideas, in a natural, balanced way. Concepts make sense to you because you have followed a logical path to your understanding and unfolding. Your foundation has been laid carefully and you are building on it. For instance, if you are exposed to the idea of reincarnation before you are ready to accept it, it may seem silly or frightening. But, when you spend time unfolding in other ways, the concept becomes more natural. It makes sense.
All things occur in their own time . . . you cannot force understanding or awareness. Concepts that were once foreign to you will seem natural and correct, when you are ready to accept them.
If you give a child a musical instrument and then force them to practice and insist that they play it, they will probably get very uncomfortable and may throw it down in puzzlement or even disgust, at their first chance. It could turn them off to playing an instrument for the rest of their life. But if you expose them to it gradually, and encourage their interest in a balanced way, without pressure, they may well develop a love for it.
Spiritual growth is rarely comfortable - but it's not only worthwhile, it is the whole point of our existence!
When you focus on the purely psychic, it is like eating empty calories; satisfying for the moment and not very good for you ... True spiritual awareness includes the psychic realms and experiences - and beyond! And best of all - it lasts!
It is said that you must "own your own power or it will own you". Use the information received in whatever methods of self-discovery you are comfortable with, such as readings, tarot, therapy, dream journals, spiritual exercises, meditation, support groups, etc., to help you begin to integrate your new awareness into your daily life. When you are willing to focus on spiritual awareness, one of the greatest rewards is the discovery and understanding of your life's spiritual purpose and the end of your own Karmic dances.
Some of you have asked me what my personal spiritual philosophy or path is about. I personally follow what some people call the "Middle path."
Taking the steps which lead to self-responsibility leads to spiritual freedom. We get the exact amount of spiritual freedom that we allow the people in our lives. Or we could say that we get the least amount that we allow other people in our lives.
]]>It is a spiritual path that is all about balance and self-responsibility. It's a razor's edge that can be difficult to walk. It insists that integrity is not elastic.
How did I learn about this path?
Well, I have had few teachers on this path. I think we could all agree that self-responsibility has never been a popular concept in most Cultures, so finding people who are on this path is not always easy. Often we don't talk about it much.
My life has been my greatest teacher for I have gone out of balance on the path of Balance and I have been irresponsible on the path of Self-Responsibility.
This path includes the understanding that life goes in cycles and that change is constant; for only with change do you experience growth. Learning to let go of expectations and make the most of the things that life brings your way is something that most people would agree sounds like a useful skill.
Taking the steps which lead to self-responsibility leads to spiritual freedom. We get the exact amount of spiritual freedom that we allow the people in our lives. Or we could say that we get the least amount that we allow other people in our lives.
Who is it in your life that you feel the need to control?
Even if you do real well in the control area with most people, you only get the amount of spiritual freedom that you give to that one person.
That doesn't mean that you should let someone else control you either. This path is about balance and self-responsibility-- and supporting those in others. It's not about being a victim -- or a victimizer.
It is about having compassionate, yet detached, love for other beings. All people have their unresolved issues that they are compelled to act out in some way. If there are people who feel compelled to act theirs out in your life, and if you don't want them to -- If it is destructive to your life -- grant them the freedom to act it our somewhere else!
I caused myself a lot of heartache as I lived in extremes for much of my younger life. But slowly I learned that I didn't flourish and I wasn't happy at the limits of my own endurance - and I liked myself better when i lived in the middle.
This path is a slow steady opening that allows time to process new understanding. It includes exciting times of discovery and explosive growth, yes, but also the quiet times to reflect on what you have learned. (See my Post on Bear Medicine!) It is not a path that makes flashy promises. At first glance it may seem like a slower path, but, it is always steady. It includes the understanding that life goes in cycles and that change is constant; for only with change do you experience growth.
Many wise people have said that the assurance of a true spiritual path is that when you look back at your life after a year of truly dedicating yourself to it, you will see that your life has changed and you have grown in your understanding. I can say for certain that it's been true for me!
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